All of a sudden, on my way out to the lobby, I got old Jane Gallagher on the brain again. I got her on, and I couldn't get her off. I sat down in this vomity-looking chair in the lobby and thought about her and Stradlater sitting in that goddam Ed Banky's car, and though I was pretty damn sure old Stradlater hadn't given her the time--I know old Jane like a book--I still couldn't get her off my brain. I knew her like a book. I really did. I mean, besides checkers, she was quite fond of all athletic sports, and after I got to know her, the whole summer long we played tennis together almost every morning and golf almost every afternoon. I really got to know her quite intimately. I don't mean it was anything physical or anything--it wasn't--but we saw each other all the time. You don't always have to get too sexy to get to know a girl.
Holden has a thing for Jane, obviously. She's his ideal girl. Innocent but sexy. Wounded in some way that isn't very clear. Jane is lost in the rye field, too, and Holden wants to be there to catch her before she falls off the cliff.
Holden is an idealist. For all his talk about being "sexy" with girls, for all the smoking and drinking he does during the course of the novel, he really is pretty innocent. He doesn't want to grow up, and he wants to save every other kid he sees from growing up, too. Really, what motivates Holden through the entire book is love. Love for his brother Allie. Love for Jane. Love for his sister Phoebe. It all boils down to love, for him.
I have a new poem today. It's all about love, and is sort of inspired by the United States' Supreme Court's recent decision to strike down portions of the Defense of Marriage Act. Love can't be legislated or controlled or dictated, by government or church or family. It's one of human nature's unstoppable forces.
Saint Marty has great faith in love.
Waiting for Independence Day Fireworks 2013
On this July 4,
a girl with pink hair
wrestles a pit bull
in the grass as Black Pearl
plays "Stand by Me"
on the bandstand.
The sky touches the ground
with a wide palm
of sun, day clinging
to these last suckling moments,
nursing dusk's green milk.
So much skin and tattoo around,
flesh against flesh.
I smell coconut
from a flock of teenage
girls who whisper and giggle by,
Budweiser and Marlboros
from the boys close behind them.
An old man and woman sit
in lawn chairs to my left,
eat bratwurst, watch
kids loft Frisbees into the darkening
air. When she's down
to her last bite, the old woman
reaches over, feeds it
to the old man, who accepts it,
kisses her fingertips, his lips
smeared with mustard.
Two men appear.
One carries a blanket.
Their hands almost touch
as they walk together.
They spread their blanket
on the ground, the way
my mom and dad
used to spread towels
on the beach in August,
without need for word
or direction, an easy ballet
of arm and hand, crouch,
kneel, an act they'd repeated
so many times it gleamed
like a rock in lake shallows,
polished for years by tides, waves.
Everyone pauses as the men
sit close to each other,
gray heads like twin dandelions
sprouting from a single weed.
They talk, laugh, drink beer
from brown, long-necked bottles.
Soon, we all forget to be shocked
as night overtakes us,
makes us all the same,
one crowd, indivisible,
under stars and moon,
our bodies primed
for the freedom to love
the sky any way we want.
Confessions of Saint Marty
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