March 2: Oscar At Last

Me and the boys

As you can see by the picture, I have finally obtained the Oscars I won last Sunday night.  I haven't won these trophies for quite a few years, so I'm quite happy.

I will not go into detail about how I got the Oscars.  Let me just say, there was no kicking or screaming.  No extortion.  No bloodshed.  No nudity.  No song and dance number.  No threats.  No defecation on the carpet.  It was a painless mission.

Now that they've been in my possession for close to three hours, I still have a warm, fuzzy glow, and I haven't had any alcohol at all.  If I happen to pee the bed tonight, I'll know I have a serious problem that needs medication.  I actually thought of having a victory drink tonight, but the strongest thing I have in the house is orange juice.

I will be taking these guys to bed tonight.  They may be gold and hard and a little stiff...OK, I'm not going to finish that statement, because there's just no way to end it gracefully.

Saint Marty is overcome.  In the words of Sally Field, "You like me.  You really like me."  In the words of Dustin Hoffman, "Look, he has no genitalia."

Just one more look before we retire