July 23: Anticipation, Sending Out, Getting Back

Just as in childhood his anticipation of the monthly issue of St. Nicholas had been greatly enhanced by the suspense of contributing to it, so had his trips to the newsstand gained in importance as he sent out light verse and small stories to newspaper columnists...

I love reading about E. B. White struggling as a young writer in New York.  Sending out his poems and stories.  Waiting to see his name in print.  White wasn't much different than I am now.  It gives me hope.  Charlotte's Web.  "Once More to the Lake."  Stuart Little.  White wrote a lot of classics.  And White also was neurotic and unsure of himself.

The process of sending out poems is difficult.  Every magazine advises would-be contributors to read back issues, familiarize themselves with the content.  Well, that would be great, if I could afford it.  Google helps out sometimes.  But it's all a crapshoot, basically.  There are a lot of really great poets out there, and I'm competing with all of them.

Every day, when I check my e-mail, I cringe.  Rejection is never easy.  Getting back an electronic message from editors saying something like "Thanks for sending us your poems but we hated them" is bruising.  Deflating.  Yet, writers are masochists.  We keep sending out our stuff, waiting, hoping.  Getting rejected never gets easy.  It always hurts a little.

Until that one moment when the electronic message from an editor goes something like "We are happy to accept your poem 'Anal Retention' for publication in our next issue."  Then, for several weeks, you feel special.  Chosen.  As if God has reached down and touched you.

Saint Marty hasn't been touched like that in a while.

Touch me, please!