|Last year's Fun Run. I'm in there somewhere.|
Tonight, I have to decorate a float for a parade tomorrow. Usually, I avoid being a part of parades. I prefer to sit on a curb and collect the candy that's thrown. However, the band of which I'm a member was asked to play on a float. I'm doing it for Jesus. I'm hoping tonight's preparations won't take too long.
|Last year's parade|
My wife's twentieth class reunion is taking place Saturday night, as well. She hasn't received an invitation, doesn't know where it's being held. Supposedly, her class has a float in the parade. She can't find out anything about that, either. She wants to go the reunion instead of the fireworks tomorrow night. I hate those kinds of events. Plus, our daughter will be really disappointed if she doesn't get to go to the fireworks. That's another worry.
However, my biggest worry today is about money. During the summers, I don't teach at the university. Being an adjunct, I'm a contract instructor. That means, every semester, I have to sign a new contract. I'm never guaranteed anything. Well, when the checks stop coming from the university about mid-April, things start getting really lean, financially. This summer, we've had three huge car repairs, totalling over $2,000. Those repairs, coupled with the normal monthly bills, have depleted our savings account substantially. For some reason, today I've found myself in an absolute state of panic about money. It's grocery day, and we also have to pay the water bill, which I just realized was overdue. I don't get another paycheck until next Friday.
I don't know why I'm sharing all this information with you. Worry, especially money worries, tend to really throw me off-balance. I often hear stories about people who are at the end of their ropes, financially, and hand their concerns over to God; those stories usually end with some unexpected check arriving in the mail or a forgotten loan that's suddenly repaid in the nick of time. I have a really hard time turning things over to God like that. I'm not sure if it's a problem with faith or trust or fear. It's probably all of those things rolled into one, huge, sweaty ball of worry. I've been trying to relax, pry my fingers off the steering wheel, so to speak. It's tough. I like to be in the driver's seat.
This weekend is going to be a complete lesson in letting go.
Saint Marty hopes he survives.
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