June 4: "3:00 AM," a Whopper, "Threat of Rain"

Billy Collins can't sleep . . . 

3:00 AM

by: Billy Collins

Only my hand

is asleep,

but it's a start.

Yes, I'm writing this close to midnight.  No, I'm not tired.  Yes, I know I should get eight hours of sleep every night.  No, my hand isn't asleep.  Yes, I'm watching Letters from the Big Man for around the 28th time.  (If you've never seen it, you should.)  No, I'm not eating a Cosmic Brownie.  Really.  I'm not.  I swear.

Just looked outside.  It's supposed to rain overnight.  Judging by the wind right now, there's a storm blowing in.  A whopper.  (Yes, that is an allusion to The Wizard of Oz.)  Maybe I should close my eyes, click my heels together three times, and say, "Donald Trump's a felon, Donald Trump's a felon, Donald Trump's a felon," hoping some winged monkeys will fly my neighbor's "Trump 2024" lawn sign off to Saskatchewan.  

Saint Marty has way too much on his mind tonight.

Threat of Rain

by: Martin Achatz

The meteorologist on TV

says there's a threat of rain

tonight.  Does that mean

when God gets home from work

and finds out about climate change

he's going to go all Noah on our asses?