June 11: One Dove Chocolate, Going, Going, Gone

I'm going to try an experiment.  I have a Dove chocolate before me.  I'm going to now put the chocolate into my mouth and allow it to dissolve.  I'm not going to bite or chew.  While the chocolate melts, I will type.  When the chocolate is completely gone, I will finish my post.  We'll see how long I last.

OK, chocolate in...

It is starting to melt.  It's lovely and creamy between my cheek and gum line.  I can feel it slowly disappearing.  It's filling my mouth with a sweet, almost paste-like texture.  Think Colgate.  Or melting peanut butter.  Saliva is building up in my mouth now, the kind you get when you eat Oreos.  Thick, almost slimy.  If I spit right now, my sputum would look like the contents of a spittoon.  The paste is breaking down to components that are a little smoky and fruity.  There's a reason why I'm not a chocolate sucker.  I prefer my chocolate quick and dirty.  Usually, by this point in consuming a chocolate product, I'm chewing, swallowing, and washing it down with Diet Mountain Dew.  When I eat M&M's, I take them singly and split the candy coating off the chocolate with my teeth.  Then I rub the chocolate with my tongue against the roof of my mouth until it's gone.  I'm almost done with the Dove now.  It's leaving the inside of my mouth a little raw, as if it's been exposed to something intensely hot.  It's going, going...I'm swallowing, swallowing...going, going...slimy, coffee taste...gone.

Saint Marty needs a drink of water.

Are you a sucker or a chewer?