July 14: Saint Francis Solano, Dad's Birthday, Worry

Today, my father turns 84 years old.  We are having a birthday partY for him tonight.  The birthday present I purchased for him arrived yesterday from  Amazon.  I bought him a copy of Charles Portis' novel, True Grit.  My dad loves the John Wayne movie adaptation.  I bought him the Coen brothers' movie adaptation for Father's Day.  I'm just continuing a theme,  I guess.  My father has only recently begun reading books a great deal.  However, he only professes to like non-fiction histories.  A novel is a big leap for him.  That's why I went with a novel that he's somewhat familiar with.

My dad's birthday gift

All day, my coworkers have been stressing over money issues.  See, the administrators of the hospital for which we work have been hinting at lay-offs and cost-saving measures for several weeks now.  This afternoon, the CFO of the hospital held employee "round tables" in which he laid out the whole, grim picture.  The people in my office are feeling threatened and insecure about the future.  It's understandable.  Many of them are the primary wage-earners of their households, or they are the ones who provide the medical insurance for their families.  I'm worried, as well.  However, I'm prone to worry.  It comes naturally to me.  I think I started worrying before I took my first steps.  I probably looked across the room and thought, in my one- or two-year-old head, "Do I really need that stuffed giraffe?  That floor looks really hard."

Watch out for the floor!

Today's saint, Francis Solano, was born in Spain in 1549.  At the age of 20, he became a Franciscan friar.  Then, at the age of 40, he he was sent to the New World to minister to native people of South America.  The Lives of the Saints says Francis

...became known as the Wonderworker of the New World.  A single word from him his lips would cause an attacking army to fall back.  When his companions were hungry, a command uttered by him brought in fish from the sea.  The simple movement of his hand caused a raging bull to become tranquil at his feet.

Francis died in Lima, Peru, in 1610.  That's about 21 years of preaching and miracle-working and converting in a land that was probably, at times, pretty hostile to his efforts.  Talk about throwing caution to the wind, taking a leap of faith, trusting in your Higher Power.  However you want to think about it.  Being attacked by marauding soldiers?  No sweat.  Feeling a little peckish?  How does seafood sound?  Being charged by rabid livestock?  Abracadabra, no more mad cow.

It takes a person of huge faith to be able to perform acts like that.  I'm not sure I'm quite as confident as Francis was.  I'm a worrier.  I'm comfortable with worry.  It's familiar to me.  It may cause me stress, give me some sleepless nights, and make me crave Milky Ways, but worry, in a strange way, is my security blanket.  I can wrap myself up in it.  I know that when I wake up tomorrow morning, I'll have the same worries I had the day before.  Pretty messed up, huh?  Welcome to my world.

I did, however, take a leap with my father's birthday present.  I think that counts as a step forward.  A teeny, tiny step forward.  Maybe tomorrow I'll spend every cent of my paycheck on something completely impractical, like a facelift or iPad or the Oxford English Dictionary.  I just saw on Google that someone bought a Jane Austen original manuscript today for 1.6 million dollars.  That's what I'm talking about.  Something totally useless.  Maybe if I wave my hand and say "iPad," God will send me one.  That's what Francis Solano would have done.  Of course, Francis would have given the iPad to some indigent person with WiFi access.

Saint Marty is going to take a flying leap of faith tonight.  He's going to eat chocolate ice cream instead of vanilla at his father's birthday party.

Taking a leap...