Saturday, April 27, 2019

April 27: On My Mind, Rose's Brother, "Fear Not"

I know that I shared this poem a few months ago, but, obviously, my sister, Rose, is on my mind.  I think this is one of the only poems that I've ever written about her.  I don't know why that is.  I've written about a lot of really personal subjects in my poetry, but Rose hasn't been one of those subjects.

It's difficult speaking about having a special needs sibling.  It's all I've ever known.  It's my normal.  I've never thought of my life as different simply because of my sister.  One of the reasons for this is because we've never treated her any differently than anyone else in the family.  That is a testament to my parents.  Rose is simply Marty's sister.

And Saint Marty is simply Rose's brother.

Fear Not

by:  Martin Achatz

My sister Rose spoke with the Virgin
One night when lightning laced
The sky and thunder rolled
Like a wailing ambulance.
Rose, with black hair, eyes dark
As baker's chocolate.  Rose, who listened
To the rain drill the ground, felt terror
In her chest, blooming like a mushroom.
Rose, with Down's Syndrome,
Her speech thick,
Weighing on her tongue like rust.

She knew nothing of atmospheres,
Weather fronts, lightning that traveled
From the ground to the heavens
Like a white hot soul.  She knew
Nothing of raining frogs,
Hailstones the size of peach pits.
Hers was a child's fear, as simple
As shadow in a closet.
When she knelt at the foot of her bed,
Folded small fingers,
Her prayers opened like sunflowers
In the still air.

Mother found Rose that night,
Speaking with the darkness.
She looked like moonlight, her words
Agates, smooth, round, polished.
Rose, imperfect since birth,
Slower than summer heat,
Filled the room with light.

Anne came upon her daughter
Like that, too, Mary in the dark,
Her childhood fears sitting
On the windowsill like empty bowls
Waiting for rain.

Mary spread her arms,
Wrapped them around the angel,
Pressing her mouth to his neck.
She tasted lightning and shadow
On his bright skin, swallowed them,
Felt them take root
In her belly.  She opened
Her robe, guided his lips
To her boy chest,
Motherhood swelling
In her rose nipple.


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