January 6: Point D, Bypasses and Wait Times, Haunted Mansion

When last we left Arthur Dent, he was trying to stop a bulldozer from demolishing his house by laying down in front of it . . .

"I'm afraid you're going to have to accept it," said Mr. Prosser gripping his fur hat and rolling it round the top of his head,"this bypass has got to be built and it's going to be built!"

"First I've heard of it," said Arthur, "why's it going to be built?"

Mr. Prosser shook his finger at him for a bit, then stopped and put it away again.

"What do you mean why's it got to be built?" he said.  "It's a bypass.  You've got to build bypasses."

Bypasses are devices which allow some people to drive from point A to point B very fast whilst other people dash from point B to point A very fast.  People living at point C, being a point directly between, are often given to wonder what's so great about point A that so many people of point B are so keen to get there, and what's so great about point B that so many people of point A are so keen to get there.  They often wish that people would just once and for all work out where the hell they wanted to be.

Mr. Porsser wanted to be at point D.  Point D wasn't anywhere in particular, it was just any convenient point a very long way from points A, B, and C.  He would have a nice little cottage at point D, with axes over the door, and spend a pleasant amount of time at point E, which would be the nearest pub to point D.  His wife of course wanted climbing roses, but he wanted axes.  He didn't know why--he just liked axes.  He flushed hotly under the derisive grings of the bulldozer drivers.

He shifted his weight from foot to foot, but it was equally uncomfortable on each.  Obviously somebody had been appallingly incompetent and he hoped to God it wasn't him.

That's what I've been doing a lot of since we arrived in Orlando, moving from point A to point B to point D, bypassing point C because the line is too long, then going back to point C later in the day because the app says that there's only a 25-minute line.  On the way to point C, however, someone has to go to the restroom or buy a bottle of water or a hot dog, and suddenly the 25-minute wait balloons into a 120-minute wait in the space of ten minutes. 

You get what I mean.

So, it's a little chillier this morning than it has been.  Forty-nine degrees.  That's still about 40 degrees warmer than where I live, and I'm still wearing shorts today.  Because I can.  It is supposed to climb into the 70s today, so I'm going to soak up as much vitamin D as possible.  Plus, I'm in Florida.  As long as it's not snowing, it's beach clothing for me.

Yesterday was lovely.  We spent a good portion of the day eating and shopping and eating some more at Disney Springs, which is where all the restaurants and stores are located.  Had a few drinks, some eggnog gelato.  Walked through the Christmas Tree Trail--all kinds of trees theme-decorated to Disney movies and attractions.  Right up my alley.

Then, it was off to the Magic Kingdom, by way of bus and monorail.  We rode on the Carousel of Progress, PeopleMover, Pirates of the Caribbean, Buzz Lightyear, Enchanted Tiki Room, Hall of Presidents, and, finally, Haunted Mansion (my daughter's favorite).  In between moving to all those points, we shopped and ate a little, as well.  Basically, we closed the park down.

Despite all the bypassing we did, it was a lovely, chillaxing kind of day.  My son had barely any meltdowns, despite the fact that his ADHD medication wore off about three hours before the Magic Kingdom closed, and my daughter only cried once.  That's a win/win day in my books.

Saint Marty is ready to hit more bypasses today!