August 15: Powerful Speaker, Nobel Prize in Literature, Arguing

“Let me hear another sound from you," said Scrooge, “and you’ll keep your Christmas by losing your situation.  You’re quite a powerful speaker, Sir,” he added, turning to his nephew.  “I wonder you don’t go into Parliament.”

Scrooge is not a pleasant guy, at least not at the beginning of the book.  He threatens poor Bob several times in the opening pages.  He argues with his nephew, Fred, and pretty much tells him to go to hell.  Yet, Scrooge also seems to obtain great pleasure in this verbal sparring.  When Scrooge gets the better of the two gentlemen seeking a charitable donation a little while later, he practically gloats (Scrooge resumed his labors with an improved opinion of himself, and in more facetious temper than was usual with him).  Scrooge likes to argue.

This morning, I started reading a conversation thread on the World Literature Forum on the Internet.  The thread deals with the 2012 Nobel Prize in Literature.  Most people who follow the Nobel Prize are nerdy literature students and professors and translators and wannabe writers.  I proudly claim my spot in that company.  This particular discussion thread was started just last week, and there are already six pages of comments and barbs and witty (sometimes) repartee.  Nobody agrees about anything or anyone.  Some love Cormac McCarthy.  Some love Chinua Achebe. Some love Amos Oz.  Everyone hates Philip Roth.

About the only thing everyone agrees upon (aside from Philip Roth hatred) is the fact that they all love the game of argument.  Who is right or who is wrong is irrelevant come October when the winner of the Nobel is announced.  What is important is who sounds smart and well-read and literary.  Some of these people can read six languages.  Others have a clear-cut agenda, simply pushing one writer to the forefront of the discussion.  One year, there was a rabid John Ashbery fan whose response to anyone seemed to be, “Yes, but what about John Ashbery?”

I can get into these discussions, although I never engage in them.  I like to sit on the sidelines and watch the lions tear each other apart.  Funny thing is, none of the people in this Nobel discussion thread will get it right.  They will just cannibalize each other for the next two months and then move on until next July or August, when the whole process starts over again.

I kind of get the feeling that Scrooge is a lot like these literary duelists.  They all think they’re right.  They all think they’re smart.  They all think they’re funny. In the end, they’re all wrong, just like Scrooge.  And they’ll all be haunted by the Ghosts of Nobel Past, Present, and Future.

By the way, in case you’re interested, Saint Marty is going to win the 2012 Nobel Prize in Literature.

Ashbery--always a bridesmaid