I would like to reflect a little on anger in this post. I've been thinking a lot about a person I've held a grudge against for a very long time. I tend to hold on to past slights like a housewife holds on to her copy of Fifty Shades of Grey. I don't let go. It's a trait I think I inherited from my father. I had a creative writing instructor in college who was incredibly nasty to me. She was so mean that I couldn't write anything for close to a year after I took her class. She was that mean, and I have never forgiven her for close to twenty years.
I know it's not healthy to hold on to anger that long. Chances are, that writing professor doesn't even remember me. If I were smart, I'd say a prayer for her, forgive her, and then move on, hoping that she comes down with a case of permanent writer's constipation. I know, I know. That's not quite releasing my anger, but I just can't stand this person. And, of course, because I refuse to forgive her, she still holds a certain power over me. That power can still make me feel like an uncertain grad student.
I know all this in my rational mind. In my irrational mind, I just want this woman to step into a busy intersection and get clipped by a speeding bus.
Thus, my word of wisdom for today has to do with anger:
Hold on to your anger. It helps you remember who the assholes in your life are.
Saint Marty still has some work to do on forgiveness.
|Buddha never had my writing professor as a teacher!|