Showing posts with label supreme embarrassment. Show all posts
Showing posts with label supreme embarrassment. Show all posts

Thursday, May 19, 2016

May 19: Teenage-Hood, Aimee Nez, "Twelve Twelve Twelve"

My daughter just went to bed (although I think she's probably talking to her boyfriend on her phone).  She worked all night on her homework because she's missed a couple days of school.

I often forget how difficult it is to be a young person.  My daughter is 15, and she's struggling with all the things that teenage-hood brings.  Sometimes she's funny and relaxed around me.  Other times, I'm a supreme embarrassment, and she walks at least 25 feet ahead of me.  Things like blemishes and cold sores can be catastrophic.  Like I said, it's difficult being a young person.

That's what today's poem from Aimee Nez is about:  the trials of growing up.

Thank goodness Saint Marty grew up.

Twelve Twelve Twelve

by:  Aimee Nezhukumatathil

a.) When I was twelve, I lived
on the grounds of a mental asylum.
b). My Filipino mother was a psychiatrist,
so that meant we lived
in the doctor’s quarters—
one of the three big brick houses
that edged the institute.
c). My younger sister and I practiced Herkies—
our favorite cheerleading jumps—
off the patients’ bleachers near the softball field.
d). When I was twelve, I aced
the experiments
with celery and food coloring;
they let me skip a whole grade
and get right to The Dissections.
e). I secretly wished my supply
of grape Bubble Yum would never run out
but I couldn’t figure out how to blow bubbles
and snap the lavender gum like Sara could.
f). We sold gift wrap and crystals
for a junior high fund-raiser and my mom still asks
Where are all the crystals I bought?
and
Why don’t you display them in your house?
g). When I was twelve, I worried about
the darkening hair on my legs.
My mother bought me my first training bra—
no cup, just little triangle pieces stitched together—
and then a slice of New York-style cheesecake
to bring home.
h). Home.
i). When I was twelve, our house
always smelled of fried lumpia
or ginger.
j). We had zinnias
as wide as my outstretched hand
nodding at us in our garden.
k). My school had to create
a whole new bus stop
just for my sister and me,
and everyone stopped talking and stared
when we stepped onto the bus each morning,
smelling of grape gum and ginger roots.
l.) Just who are these girls?

Thursday, March 21, 2013

March 21: Sort of Funny, Stupid Laughs, Poetry Reading

The whole thing was sort of funny, in a way, if you thought about it, and all of a sudden I did something I shouldn't have.  I laughed.  And I have one of these very loud, stupid laughs.  I mean if I ever sat behind myself in a movie or something, I'd probably lean over and tell myself to please shut up.  It made old Sally madder than ever.

Holden does a lot of things to piss people off in The Catcher in the Rye.  In the above paragraph, he manages to offend his date.  He laughs in uncomfortable situations.  He has just told Sally that she gives him "a pain in the ass," and she is not reacting well to his constructive criticism.  That's why Holden is laughing.

I tend to be like Holden in stressful circumstances.  When I go out to my car at the end of a crappy day and I have a flat tire, or when I leave for work at 4:30 a.m. in a blizzard, I laugh, giggle, chortle, guffaw, snicker.  I probably look and sound like Norman registering Marion Crane into the Bates Motel.  It's about tension release in a situation over which I have no control.

Tonight, I'm giving a poetry reading at church.  Before Ash Wednesday, I sat down with the pastor and worked out the schedule for a series of Thursday night events during the Lenten season.  The first week was a concert by the church's praise band (a bust).  The second week, nothing happened (I was busy, the pastor was out-of-town).  The third week was a slide show and discussion of the pastor's recent trip to the Holy Land (a success--over twenty people attended).  The fourth week, a Christian comedy video (hilariously funny, but only two other people showed up).  The fifth week, tonight, is my poetry reading.  I'm not holding out too much hope.

That doesn't mean I won't enjoy myself.  I will have at least three or four people in the audience.  One of those people will be a colleague from the university.  The possibility of supreme embarrassment is huge.  If only three people attend, I will laugh, perhaps make a joke about trying the veal and tipping the waiter, and then read my poems.

However, I've enjoyed preparing for tonight.  Going through my poems, selecting what I'm going to read, talking to the musicians who are helping me out.  That's all been great fun.  Now comes the litmus test.  There are a two possible scenarios for this evening:

Poetry + Musicians - Audience = Embarrassed Laughter + Humiliation

or

Poetry + Musicians + Audience = Blessings + Grace

Stop by Mitchell United Methodist Church in Negaunee, Michigan, at 7 p.m. tonight.  Be a part of the equation.

Saint Marty will do his part to establish equilibrium.

Where's Sean Connery when I need him