That whale of Stubb's, so dearly purchased, was duly brought to the
Pequod's side, where all those cutting and hoisting operations
previously detailed, were regularly gone through, even to the baling of
the Heidelburgh Tun, or Case.
While some were occupied with this
latter duty, others were employed in dragging away the larger tubs, so
soon as filled with the sperm; and when the proper time arrived, this
same sperm was carefully manipulated ere going to the try-works, of
which anon.
It had cooled and crystallized to such a degree, that
when, with several others, I sat down before a large Constantine's bath
of it, I found it strangely concreted into lumps, here and there rolling
about in the liquid part. It was our business to squeeze these lumps
back into fluid. A sweet and unctuous duty! No wonder that in old times
sperm was such a favorite cosmetic. Such a clearer! such a sweetener!
such a softener; such a delicious mollifier! After having my hands in it
for only a few minutes, my fingers felt like eels, and began, as it
were, to serpentine and spiralize.
As I sat there at my ease,
cross-legged on the deck; after the bitter exertion at the windlass;
under a blue tranquil sky; the ship under indolent sail, and gliding so
serenely along; as I bathed my hands among those soft, gentle globules
of infiltrated tissues, wove almost within the hour; as they richly
broke to my fingers, and discharged all their opulence, like fully ripe
grapes their wine; as. I snuffed up that uncontaminated aroma,-
literally and truly, like the smell of spring violets; I declare to you,
that for the time I lived as in a musky meadow; I forgot all about our
horrible oath; in that inexpressible sperm, I washed my hands and my
heart of it; I almost began to credit the old Paracelsan superstition
that sperm is of rare virtue in allaying the heat of anger; while
bathing in that bath, I felt divinely free from all ill-will, or
petulance, or malice, of any sort whatsoever.
Squeeze! squeeze!
squeeze! all the morning long; I squeezed that sperm till I myself
almost melted into it; I squeezed that sperm till a strange sort of
insanity came over me; and I found myself unwittingly squeezing my
co-laborers' hands in it, mistaking their hands for the gentle globules.
Such an abounding, affectionate, friendly, loving feeling did this
avocation beget; that at last I was continually squeezing their hands,
and looking up into their eyes sentimentally; as much as to say,- Oh! my
dear fellow beings, why should we longer cherish any social acerbities,
or know the slightest ill-humor or envy! Come; let us squeeze hands all
round; nay, let us all squeeze ourselves into each other; let us
squeeze ourselves universally into the very milk and sperm of kindness.
Would
that I could keep squeezing that sperm for ever! For now, since by many
prolonged, repeated experiences, I have perceived that in all cases man
must eventually lower, or at least shift, his conceit of attainable
felicity; not placing it anywhere in the intellect or the fancy; but in
the wife, the heart, the bed, the table, the saddle, the fire-side; the
country; now that I have perceived all this, I am ready to squeeze case
eternally. In thoughts of the visions of the night, I saw long rows of
angels in paradise, each with his hands in a jar of spermaceti.
Now,
while discoursing of sperm it behooves to speak of other things akin to
it, in the business of preparing the sperm whale for the try-works.
First comes white-horse, so called, which is obtained from the tapering
part of the fish, and also from the thicker portions of his flukes. It
is tough with congealed tendons- a wad of muscle- but still contains
some oil. After being severed from the whale, the white-horse is first
cut into portable oblongs ere going to the mincer. They look much like
blocks of Berkshire marble.
Plum-pudding is the term bestowed upon
certain fragmentary parts of the whale's flesh, here and there adhering
to the blanket of blubber, and often participating to a considerable
degree in its unctuousness. It is a most refreshing, convivial,
beautiful object to behold. As its name imports, it is of an exceedingly
rich, mottled tint, with a bestreaked snowy and golden ground, dotted
with spots of the deepest crimson and purple. It is plums of rubies, in
pictures of citron. Spite of reason, it is hard to keep yourself from
eating it. I confess, that once I stole behind the foremast to try it.
It tasted something as I should conceive a royal cutlet from the thigh
of Louis le Gros might have tasted, supposing him to have been killed
the first day after the venison season, and that particular venison
season contemporary with an unusually fine vintage of the vineyards of
Champagne.
There is another substance, and a very singular one,
which turns up in the course of this business, but which I feel it to be
very puzzling adequately to describe. It is called slobgollion; an
appellation original with the whalemen, and even so is the nature of the
substance. It is an ineffably oozy, stringy affair, most frequently
found in the tubs of sperm, after a prolonged squeezing, and subsequent
decanting. I hold it to be the wondrously thin, ruptured membranes of
the case, coalescing.
Gurry, so called, is a term properly
belonging to right whalemen, but sometimes incidentally used by the
sperm fishermen. It designates the dark, glutinous substance which is
scraped off the back of the Greenland or right whale, and much of which
covers the decks of those inferior souls who hunt that ignoble
Leviathan.
Nippers. Strictly this word is not indigenous to the
whale's vocabulary. But as applied by whalemen, it becomes so. A
whaleman's nipper is a short firm strip of tendinous stuff cut from the
tapering part of Leviathan's tail: it averages an inch in thickness, and
for the rest, is about the size of the iron part of a hoe. Edgewise
moved along the oily deck, it operates like a leathern squilgee; and by
nameless blandishments, as of magic, allures along with it all
impurities.
But to learn all about these recondite matters, your
best way is at once to descend into the blubber-room, and have a long
talk with its inmates. This place has previously been mentioned as the
receptacle for the blanket-pieces, when stript and hoisted from the
whale. When the proper time arrives for cutting up its contents, this
apartment is a scene of terror to all tyros, especially by night. On one
side, lit by a dull lantern, a space has been left clear for the
workmen. They generally go in pairs,- a pike-and-gaffman and a
spade-man. The whaling-pike is similar to a frigate's boarding-weapon of
the same name. The gaff is something like a boat-hook. With his gaff,
the gaffman hooks on to a sheet of blubber, and strives to hold it from
slipping, as the ship pitches and lurches about. Meanwhile, the
spade-man stands on the sheet itself, perpendicularly chopping it into
the portable horse-pieces. This spade is sharp as hone can make it; the
spademan's feet are shoeless; the thing he stands on will sometimes
irresistibly slide away from him, like a sledge. If he cuts off one of
his own toes, or one of his assistants', would you be very much
astonished? Toes are scarce among veteran blubber-room men.
This chapter is a little strange. Full of homoerotic symbolism. I would say that Melville is being a little heavy-handed, if it weren't such a terrible pun. Let's just say that this passage is not very subtle. Now, whether Melville intended to include a strongly queer reading of this novel is questionable. My guess is that he did it intuitively, without fully realizing all the implications of what he wrote.
I experience similar things all the time when I'm working on a poem or essay or short story. I start writing with a certain idea of where I'm headed. Suddenly, the poem goes in a direction I didn't expect. The essay, which I thought was about solar eclipses, turned out to be about childhood mental illness. That sort of thing. That's when the writer has to step aside and let the writing take over.
I'm not going to get all New Age here, talk about channeling, although that is one explanation for inspiration. Some Christians call it the power of the Holy Spirit. God working through you. Speaking in tongues and all that. I don't discount that possibility at all. It depends on your belief system, I suppose. If you're Christian, it's the fiery dove. If you believe in reincarnation, it's Marie Antionette or Truman Capote or Queen Elizabeth.
For the last year or so, I've been channeling Bigfoot, in all his hairy, wild wisdom. He's been my Holy Spirit, if you will. Melville speaks in the tongue of Ishmael. I speak in the tongue of Sasquatch. Yesterday, I wrote a new poem. It wrote it quickly, full of hairy fire. It was far from perfect. It needs a good five or six more drafts before it's even close to decent. I'm not even sure what it's really about at the moment. Bigfoot will show me the way.
Tonight, Saint Marty is thankful for the Holy Spirit of Sasquatch.
Poet...Musician...Thinker...Blogger...Teacher...Husband...Father...I'm not perfect, but I try!
Showing posts with label Holy Spirit. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Holy Spirit. Show all posts
Tuesday, August 7, 2018
Saturday, June 13, 2015
June 13: Chanting, Holy Spirit, New Cartoon, Michael Mlekoday, "Going North"
On that occasion, during Holy Week, Father Tom, transplanted from the Bronx and studying advanced Latin at the Gregorian University, had told them [Ives and his family] about a tenth-century church in Trastevere where some of the most devout Catholics in Rome gathered on Wednesday evenings for services that would "tear one's heart out," as he had put it. So they went, and no sooner had they entered its candlelit gloom than Ives did feel the presence of early Christian spirits. That night worshipers took turns giving testimony to their faith and strong belief in Him before the congregation. They wept, beat their chests, they lay stretched out on their bellies on the floor, praying. Others crawled on their knees, hands folded in prayer, toward the altar, their shadows thrown high against the vaulted walls. Chanting in Latin, their eyes wide open, they seemed to be seeing something--the presence of Jesus of the Mother or the Holy Spirit--that Ives could not.
Ives is a deeply spiritual man. Yet, he struggles with his faith, as most Christians do. He goes to church every Sunday. He does charitable work in his neighborhood. Quietly. Above all, Ives teaches his children to love God. On a trip to Italy, he takes his family to the church described in the above passage. He marvels at the utter surrender in the worshipers. How the veil seems to have been torn away from their eyes and their vision is more eternal, less temporal. Ives strives his whole life to reach this state of understanding.
Like Ives, I've had glimpses of what I call Holy Spirit moments, when something beyond my understanding has taken hold. Sometimes, it's happened during worship services, when candlelight climbs the walls and incense clouds the air. Sometimes, it's happened during songs I've sung or played at church; the music starts, and suddenly the hair on my arms bristles and I feel . . . something moving in the place.
I was lucky. I grew up with church. I didn't have to spend years on some spiritual journey. Church was a part of my life. Always. Some people might consider that a bad thing. I don't. My upbringing has helped with my understanding of the world. I like to think that I'm a more tolerant, loving person because of it. I try not to judge too much (although I frequently fail on this account). But, I'm a work in progress, for sure.
One of my biggest failings is trust. When troubles come my way, I tend to panic. Run around, crying out, "The sky is falling!" It takes me quite a while to calm down, take a deep breath, and pray. I think it's part of my control issues. I don't like it when my life becomes a big bundle of entropy. I think Ives' biggest struggle is the same. He has a good, happy life, and then bad shit happens. For over 150 pages, he is lost, until the end of the novel. Then he's found again.
I tend to get a little lost every day. Michael Mlekoday's poem today is about going north, looking for something. I think that pretty much describes all of us. We spend our whole lives trying to avoid the scary stuff--black bears, falling ceilings, death. We walk around, sometimes in circles, looking for the answers.
Saint Marty just needs to stop walking. Look up, metaphorically. That's where the answers are written.
Going North
by: Michael Mlekoday
The black bear of a Bible
that belonged to my grandparents
has gold-lined pages, paws
dipped in honey.
Running through its forests
is like deja vu every time.
The black bear eats everything.
If you've never stared past its teeth,
you've never held your breath waiting
to be ended. The largest male black bear
weighs almost a thousand pounds
and can be found hunting at night
somewhere deep in the North.
I still have nightmares of his silence.
I haven't eaten fish since I saw him
pick a salmon from its bones.
Confessions of Saint Marty
Ives is a deeply spiritual man. Yet, he struggles with his faith, as most Christians do. He goes to church every Sunday. He does charitable work in his neighborhood. Quietly. Above all, Ives teaches his children to love God. On a trip to Italy, he takes his family to the church described in the above passage. He marvels at the utter surrender in the worshipers. How the veil seems to have been torn away from their eyes and their vision is more eternal, less temporal. Ives strives his whole life to reach this state of understanding.
Like Ives, I've had glimpses of what I call Holy Spirit moments, when something beyond my understanding has taken hold. Sometimes, it's happened during worship services, when candlelight climbs the walls and incense clouds the air. Sometimes, it's happened during songs I've sung or played at church; the music starts, and suddenly the hair on my arms bristles and I feel . . . something moving in the place.
I was lucky. I grew up with church. I didn't have to spend years on some spiritual journey. Church was a part of my life. Always. Some people might consider that a bad thing. I don't. My upbringing has helped with my understanding of the world. I like to think that I'm a more tolerant, loving person because of it. I try not to judge too much (although I frequently fail on this account). But, I'm a work in progress, for sure.
One of my biggest failings is trust. When troubles come my way, I tend to panic. Run around, crying out, "The sky is falling!" It takes me quite a while to calm down, take a deep breath, and pray. I think it's part of my control issues. I don't like it when my life becomes a big bundle of entropy. I think Ives' biggest struggle is the same. He has a good, happy life, and then bad shit happens. For over 150 pages, he is lost, until the end of the novel. Then he's found again.
I tend to get a little lost every day. Michael Mlekoday's poem today is about going north, looking for something. I think that pretty much describes all of us. We spend our whole lives trying to avoid the scary stuff--black bears, falling ceilings, death. We walk around, sometimes in circles, looking for the answers.
Saint Marty just needs to stop walking. Look up, metaphorically. That's where the answers are written.
Going North
by: Michael Mlekoday
The black bear of a Bible
that belonged to my grandparents
has gold-lined pages, paws
dipped in honey.
Running through its forests
is like deja vu every time.
The black bear eats everything.
If you've never stared past its teeth,
you've never held your breath waiting
to be ended. The largest male black bear
weighs almost a thousand pounds
and can be found hunting at night
somewhere deep in the North.
I still have nightmares of his silence.
I haven't eaten fish since I saw him
pick a salmon from its bones.
Confessions of Saint Marty
Tuesday, December 2, 2014
December 2: Searching for Grace, Joy Harjo, "Grace"
Searching for grace is difficult. Because grace isn't something that can be found. Grace is something that just happens. Unexpectedly. And it can take any form. A cup of water on a scorching July afternoon. A neighbor shoveling you out from a snow storm. A song on the radio. Or just a moment of quiet in the middle of a busy day.
I often labor under the belief that grace is something that can be earned. It isn't. Grace is something that's given freely. Call it what you want. God's love. The Holy Spirit. The Muse. It's simply a gift.
Tonight, I'm not feeling grace too much. I'm tired, anxious, sad. Ready to go home after a long, long day. I have another hour to kill in my office before I can do that. Once I'm done with this post, I'm going to work on my Christmas poem. I'm not feeling particularly inspired. But I have to get started on it. Poetry is about grace and inspiration, but poetry is also about hard work. If you read a poem that seems absolutely effortless, I can guarantee you that poem is the result of a lot of sweat, tears, and perhaps anger.
The poem below is about grace in its many forms. It feels effortless and beautiful.
But Saint Marty knows better than that.
Grace
by: Joy Harjo
I think of Wind and her wild ways the year we had nothing to lose and lost it anyway in the cursed country of the fox. We still talk about that winter, how the cold froze imaginary buffalo on the stuffed horizon of snowbanks. The haunting voices of the starved and mutilated broke fences, crashed our thermostat dreams, and we couldn’t stand it one more time.So once again we lost a winter in stubborn memory, walked through cheap apartment walls, skated through fields of ghosts into a town that never wanted us, in the epic search for grace.
Like Coyote, like Rabbit, we could not contain our terror and clowned our way through a season of false midnights. We had to swallow that town with laughter, so it would go down easy as honey. And one morning as the sun struggled to break ice, and our dreams had found us with coffee and pancakes in a truck stop along Highway 80, we found grace.
I could say grace was a woman with time on her hands, or a white buffalo escaped from memory. But in that dingy light it was a promise of balance. We once again understood the talk of animals, and spring was lean and hungry with the hope of children and corn.
I would like to say, with grace, we picked ourselves up and walked into the spring thaw. We didn’t; the next season was worse. You went home to Leech Lake to work with the tribe and I went south. And, Wind, I am still crazy. I know there is something larger than the memory of a dispossessed people. We have seen it.
I often labor under the belief that grace is something that can be earned. It isn't. Grace is something that's given freely. Call it what you want. God's love. The Holy Spirit. The Muse. It's simply a gift.
Tonight, I'm not feeling grace too much. I'm tired, anxious, sad. Ready to go home after a long, long day. I have another hour to kill in my office before I can do that. Once I'm done with this post, I'm going to work on my Christmas poem. I'm not feeling particularly inspired. But I have to get started on it. Poetry is about grace and inspiration, but poetry is also about hard work. If you read a poem that seems absolutely effortless, I can guarantee you that poem is the result of a lot of sweat, tears, and perhaps anger.
The poem below is about grace in its many forms. It feels effortless and beautiful.
But Saint Marty knows better than that.
Grace
by: Joy Harjo
for Darlene Wind and James Welch
I think of Wind and her wild ways the year we had nothing to lose and lost it anyway in the cursed country of the fox. We still talk about that winter, how the cold froze imaginary buffalo on the stuffed horizon of snowbanks. The haunting voices of the starved and mutilated broke fences, crashed our thermostat dreams, and we couldn’t stand it one more time.So once again we lost a winter in stubborn memory, walked through cheap apartment walls, skated through fields of ghosts into a town that never wanted us, in the epic search for grace.
Like Coyote, like Rabbit, we could not contain our terror and clowned our way through a season of false midnights. We had to swallow that town with laughter, so it would go down easy as honey. And one morning as the sun struggled to break ice, and our dreams had found us with coffee and pancakes in a truck stop along Highway 80, we found grace.
I could say grace was a woman with time on her hands, or a white buffalo escaped from memory. But in that dingy light it was a promise of balance. We once again understood the talk of animals, and spring was lean and hungry with the hope of children and corn.
I would like to say, with grace, we picked ourselves up and walked into the spring thaw. We didn’t; the next season was worse. You went home to Leech Lake to work with the tribe and I went south. And, Wind, I am still crazy. I know there is something larger than the memory of a dispossessed people. We have seen it.
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| Not the Grace I'm talking about... |
Monday, September 29, 2014
September 29: Poet of the Week, Lisel Mueller, "On Finding a Bird's Bones in the Woods"
REMINDER: SIX MORE DAYS UNTIL SAINT MARTY'S DAY
Some poets really seem to strip away the skin and muscle of everyday life to examine the skeleton of the universe. That's when a poem is really great. When it feels like you've somehow glimpsed the fabric of time and space. The mind of God, if you will.
As a poet, I can say it's a tremendous gift when my words fall into place and reveal a deeper truth. Call it what you want. Inspiration. The muse. Grace. The Holy Spirit. Luck. It's as if I'm a conduit in moments like that, simply a mouthpiece for something bigger than myself. I don't mean to get all mystical. I'm not Saint John of the Cross. I'm Saint Marty of the Upper Peninsula.
The Poet of the Week this time is Lisel Mueller, and she has a poem in her collection Alive Together about seeing/sensing the bones of existence.
Saint Marty has to go to a meeting of Mystics Anonymous now.
On Finding a Bird's Bones in the Woods
by: Lisel Mueller
Even Einstein, gazing
at the slender ribs of the world,
examining and praising
the cool and tranquil core
under the boil and burning
of faith and metaphor--
even he, unlearning
the bag and baggage of notion,
must have kept some shred
in which to clothe that shape,
as we, who cannot escape
imagination, swaddle
this tiny world of bone
in all that we have known
of sound and motion.
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| God has a sense of humor, too |
Monday, January 6, 2014
January 6: Closure--Not So Much
So, I'm trying to put the whole situation at church behind me. I lost my job. I can't do anything to change that fact. While I still harbor a lot of difficult emotions, I'm trying to attain some kind of closure.
Well, it's a wound that just keeps getting torn open. At church this Sunday, I did what I planned to do. I practiced with the lead singer of the praise band, and I sang in the choir. Those are two things I still enjoy doing. My wife, visiting with some friends before the service began, mentioned the fact that she was angry with the pastor. I believe the words she used were, "I hate Pastor X right now." As soon as I heard her say those words, I knew it was going to get back to me.
It did. I got an e-mail this morning from the pastor, saying that he'd heard from "someone" that I was angry with him. He wants to meet with me. I am soooo done talking about this topic. I want the whole thing to go away. Maybe the only way that's going to happen is if I simply stop going to church.
The difficult part of this whole process is that I like so many of the people at church. They're good, dear friends. They've helped me through some very difficult times in my life. Yet, I also can't get past the feeling that I've been used and tossed aside by the leadership of the church.
Well, I'm going to have to meet with the pastor. He seems fairly determined to talk with me. I can do that, I guess. I will be honest about my feelings. My feelings are not something that can be disputed. They belong to me. After that, I will listen to what he has to say. Maybe the Holy Spirit will provide some grace and closure.
That's what Saint Marty needs at the moment.
Well, it's a wound that just keeps getting torn open. At church this Sunday, I did what I planned to do. I practiced with the lead singer of the praise band, and I sang in the choir. Those are two things I still enjoy doing. My wife, visiting with some friends before the service began, mentioned the fact that she was angry with the pastor. I believe the words she used were, "I hate Pastor X right now." As soon as I heard her say those words, I knew it was going to get back to me.
It did. I got an e-mail this morning from the pastor, saying that he'd heard from "someone" that I was angry with him. He wants to meet with me. I am soooo done talking about this topic. I want the whole thing to go away. Maybe the only way that's going to happen is if I simply stop going to church.
The difficult part of this whole process is that I like so many of the people at church. They're good, dear friends. They've helped me through some very difficult times in my life. Yet, I also can't get past the feeling that I've been used and tossed aside by the leadership of the church.
Well, I'm going to have to meet with the pastor. He seems fairly determined to talk with me. I can do that, I guess. I will be honest about my feelings. My feelings are not something that can be disputed. They belong to me. After that, I will listen to what he has to say. Maybe the Holy Spirit will provide some grace and closure.
That's what Saint Marty needs at the moment.
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| This is what I need... |
Sunday, January 27, 2013
January 27: New Cartoon
Sundays are my most favorite and least favorite days of the week.
I love Sundays because I get to go to church and participate in worship. I sing with the chancel choir. I play and sing with the praise band. I get to experience some real God moments, when the Holy Spirit fills my heart. That's what I love about Sundays.
I hate Sundays because it means the end of the weekend. All the tasks I've been putting off need to be completed. I grade quizzes. I write up lesson plans. I read textbooks. I set out my work clothes for Monday morning. I prepare myself for another five days of early mornings, late nights, and lots of work in between. That's what I hate about Sundays.
Tonight, I will set out my outfit. I will pack up my books for school. I will try to hold on to the God moments for a little bit longer. The SAG Awards are on tonight. I plan to watch them with my wife and daughter. We will have some special snacks and spend time together. Then, when the last award has been handed out, we will brush out teeth and go to bed.
Saint Marty isn't quite ready for another week to begin. He's ready for some Fritos and vapid banter between shallow actors.
Confessions of Saint Marty
I love Sundays because I get to go to church and participate in worship. I sing with the chancel choir. I play and sing with the praise band. I get to experience some real God moments, when the Holy Spirit fills my heart. That's what I love about Sundays.
I hate Sundays because it means the end of the weekend. All the tasks I've been putting off need to be completed. I grade quizzes. I write up lesson plans. I read textbooks. I set out my work clothes for Monday morning. I prepare myself for another five days of early mornings, late nights, and lots of work in between. That's what I hate about Sundays.
Tonight, I will set out my outfit. I will pack up my books for school. I will try to hold on to the God moments for a little bit longer. The SAG Awards are on tonight. I plan to watch them with my wife and daughter. We will have some special snacks and spend time together. Then, when the last award has been handed out, we will brush out teeth and go to bed.
Saint Marty isn't quite ready for another week to begin. He's ready for some Fritos and vapid banter between shallow actors.
Confessions of Saint Marty
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