Young Merton has a little Easter moment . . .
Father had gone to Paris to be best man at the wedding of one of his friends from the old days in New Zealand. Capt. John Chrystal had made himself a career in the British army and was an officer in the hussars. Later on he became Governor of a prison: but he was not as dreary as that might imply. After the wedding, the Captain and his wife went off on their honeymoon, and the mother of the new Mrs. Chrystal came down to St., Antonin with Father.
Mrs. Stratton was an impressive kind of a person. She was a musician, and a singer, but I forgot whether she had been on the stage: in any case, she was not a very theatrical character, rather the opposite, although she had a certain amount of dash about her.
She was not what you would call elderly, by any means, and besides she was a woman of great vitality and strength of character, with rich intelligence and talent, and strong and precise ideas about things. Her convictions commanded respect, as did her many talents, and above all her overwhelming personal dignity. You felt that she ought to have been called Lady Stratton, or the Countess of something.
At first I was secretly resentful of the great influence she at once began to exercise over our lives, and thought she was bossing our affairs too much, but even I was able to realize that her views and advice and guidance were very valuable things. But so strong was her influence that I think it was due to her more than to anyone else that we gave up the idea of living permanently in St. Antonin.
The house was almost finished and ready for occupation, and it was a beautiful little house too, simple and solid. It looked good to live in, with that one big room with the medieval window and a huge medieval fireplace. Father had even managed to procure a winding stone stair and it was by that that you went up to the bedroom. The garden around the house, where Father had done much work, would have been fine.
On the other hand, Father was travelling too much for the house to be really useful. In the winter of 1927 he was some months at Marseilles and the rest of the time at Cette, another Mediterranean port. Soon he would have to go to England, for by this time he was ready for another exhibition. All this time I was at the Lycee, becoming more and more hard-boiled in my precocity, and getting accustomed to the idea of growing up as a Frenchman.
Then Father went to London for the exhibition.
It was the spring of 1928. The school year would soon be over. I was not thinking much about the future. All I knew was that Father would be back from England in a few days.
It was a bright, sunny morning in May when he arrived at the Lycee, and the first thing he told me was to get my things packed: we were going to England.
I looked around me like a man that has had chains struck from his hands. How the light sang on the brick walls of the prison whose gates had just burst open before me, sprung by some invisible and beneficent power: my escape from the Lycee was, I believe, providential.
Merton is set free from his chains. The doors of his prison are flung open, and the light shines down upon him. If you don't recognize the parallels in this passage to Acts 16: 25-26, where Saint Paul and Silas are set free from their prison and chains by an earthquake, then you probably weren't paying attention in Sunday school or didn't attend Sunday school at all.
It's an apt passage for tonight. It is Holy Saturday. In a usual year, at this time of the night (it is about 10:30 p.m. right now), I would be in a choir loft, playing the pipe organ and singing the Easter Vigil Mass at my church. It's one of my favorite Masses of the entire Church calendar, full of all the bells and whistles of Catholic pageantry. Candles and Gregorian chant, bells and "glorias," and, of course, clouds of incense. And, just for fun, there are also baptisms and confirmations. It's quite the show.
This year, however, my church is dark and empty. No candles flickering in the pews. No priest in Easter white intoning, "Rejoice, heavenly powers! Sing, choirs of angels!" Nope. This Holy Saturday is more tomb than resurrection.
Of course, Christians all over the world are celebrating Easter in some way tomorrow. Pope Francis has been holding solemn services all week in a vacant Saint Peter's Square. Tonight, he celebrated the Easter Vigil in a nearly empty Saint Peter's Basilica. For some reason, the images of Pope Francis sitting alone in a dark, rainy night have stuck with me. A symbol of how isolating and terrifying this pandemic is.
Of course, Easter will come tomorrow. There are five baskets, filled with chocolate, sitting on my kitchen table right now. This morning, as I was heading to church to practice some music for tomorrow (I am playing for a virtual Easter Sunday service), I passed the Easter Bunny, standing at an intersection of the highway, waving at cars. I honked and waved back. Nothing is going to stop Easter.
There is power in the message of Easter for everyone (Christian, atheist, agnostic, Jewish, Muslim, Buddhist, whatever) this year: we will rise from the ashes of this disaster. There will be light and hope in the world again. Resurrection is on its way.
Covid-19 is teaching the world some hard lessons. It's sort of knocked us all on our complacent asses. We have taken the gifts of this world for granted for a very long time. Now, we can't. When we're done sheltering in place. When we can go grocery shopping without fearing for our lives. When coming home from work isn't like returning home from war. When all this is said and done, I hope the Easter we experience is one of renewed appreciation for the graces of living in this spinning universe. That we see and treat every human being for what they really are: reflections of the Higher Power (Yahweh/God/Buddha/Jesus Christ/Allah) in our lives.
That will truly be an Easter to rejoice.
Saint Marty wishes you all a joyous Easter Vigil! He is rising . . .
Poet...Musician...Thinker...Blogger...Teacher...Husband...Father...I'm not perfect, but I try!
Showing posts with label light and hope. Show all posts
Showing posts with label light and hope. Show all posts
Saturday, April 11, 2020
Sunday, November 12, 2017
November 12: Light and Hope, Classic Saint Marty, "White Noise"
A lot of ink and air has been spilled this week over the fact that it is the one year anniversary of the election of the 45th President of the United States. It hardly seems possible that it has already been 365 days since my country went off its rocker.
I know that I sometimes climb on soapboxes when I broach this topic. Not doing that tonight. I'm too tired, and, as I approach the Christmas season, I would like to embrace light and hope instead of darkness and hatred, because I still believe that light and hope will win. I have to.
So, my Christmas decorations are up. Tonight, I may watch A Charlie Brown Christmas with my son, to get in the mood. There are still people out there--a lot of them--who welcome the poor and homeless, who don't care what color your skin is or who you love, who embrace peace and love.
I believe this with all my heart.
A year ago, it was a little harder . . .
November 12, 2016: A Tailless Sparrow, Nicks and Bumps, Healing
Nature seems to catch you by the tail. I think of all the butterflies I have seen whose torn hind wings bore the jagged marks of birds' bills. There were four or five tiger swallowtails missing one of their tails, and a fritillary missing two thirds of a hind wing. The birds, too, who make up the bulk of my list, always seem to have been snatched at from behind, except for the killdeer I saw just yesterday, who was missing all of its toes; its slender shank ended in a smooth, gray knob. Once I saw a swallowtailed sparrow, who on second look proved to be a sparrow from whose tail the central wedge of feathers had been torn. I've seen a completely tailless sparrow, a tailless robin, and a tailless grackle. Then my private list ends with one bob-tailed and one tailless squirrel, and a muskrat kit whose tail bore a sizeable nick near the spine.
Dillard spends a whole chapter of Pilgrim at Tinker Creek discussing this aspect of Nature. Chomped and be chomped. Eat and be eaten. That's the way things work. Even human beings are not immune to this design. Dillard lists all kinds of creatures that snack on people, from insects to worms. It's not a pretty picture.
Me? I have a few nicks and bumps. You don't get to be my age without such souvenirs. On either side of my right knee, I have two caterpillar-shaped scars. When I was a kid, I had an operation on my leg because my right leg is longer than my left. On the back of my neck, I have a dent from where a cyst was removed a few years ago. I am the proud owner of an appendix scar as well.
All of these things are my trophies of living on this planet as long as I have. I have been chomped, cut, bit, and stomped. As a parent, I've been peed and pooped on. My son has been throwing up all morning long. Sometimes he hits the bucket. Sometimes he doesn't. He has not hit me. Yet.
We all have to take our personal and collective hits. All experience heartbreaks and joys. Disappointments and triumphs. This week, some people in the United States have been incredibly jubilant. Other people have been angry and depressed. There will be healing, eventually. But there's going to be a whole lot of tailless robins and sparrows in the streets of America after things calm down.
I am trying to move on. Regain some perspective. I cannot share in the beliefs that shaped the outcome of last Tuesday night. They don't represent who I am. I can't embrace a movement that is founded on bigotry and hatred. I believe in love and charity and acceptance. That's what being a Christian is all about.
Saint Marty gives thanks for the scars on his leg and neck. His nicks and bumps. They are reminders that healing happens. Slowly.
And a poem for this evening about seeing truth in the storm . . .
White Noise
by: Martin Achatz
I know that I sometimes climb on soapboxes when I broach this topic. Not doing that tonight. I'm too tired, and, as I approach the Christmas season, I would like to embrace light and hope instead of darkness and hatred, because I still believe that light and hope will win. I have to.
So, my Christmas decorations are up. Tonight, I may watch A Charlie Brown Christmas with my son, to get in the mood. There are still people out there--a lot of them--who welcome the poor and homeless, who don't care what color your skin is or who you love, who embrace peace and love.
I believe this with all my heart.
A year ago, it was a little harder . . .
November 12, 2016: A Tailless Sparrow, Nicks and Bumps, Healing
Nature seems to catch you by the tail. I think of all the butterflies I have seen whose torn hind wings bore the jagged marks of birds' bills. There were four or five tiger swallowtails missing one of their tails, and a fritillary missing two thirds of a hind wing. The birds, too, who make up the bulk of my list, always seem to have been snatched at from behind, except for the killdeer I saw just yesterday, who was missing all of its toes; its slender shank ended in a smooth, gray knob. Once I saw a swallowtailed sparrow, who on second look proved to be a sparrow from whose tail the central wedge of feathers had been torn. I've seen a completely tailless sparrow, a tailless robin, and a tailless grackle. Then my private list ends with one bob-tailed and one tailless squirrel, and a muskrat kit whose tail bore a sizeable nick near the spine.
Dillard spends a whole chapter of Pilgrim at Tinker Creek discussing this aspect of Nature. Chomped and be chomped. Eat and be eaten. That's the way things work. Even human beings are not immune to this design. Dillard lists all kinds of creatures that snack on people, from insects to worms. It's not a pretty picture.
Me? I have a few nicks and bumps. You don't get to be my age without such souvenirs. On either side of my right knee, I have two caterpillar-shaped scars. When I was a kid, I had an operation on my leg because my right leg is longer than my left. On the back of my neck, I have a dent from where a cyst was removed a few years ago. I am the proud owner of an appendix scar as well.
All of these things are my trophies of living on this planet as long as I have. I have been chomped, cut, bit, and stomped. As a parent, I've been peed and pooped on. My son has been throwing up all morning long. Sometimes he hits the bucket. Sometimes he doesn't. He has not hit me. Yet.
We all have to take our personal and collective hits. All experience heartbreaks and joys. Disappointments and triumphs. This week, some people in the United States have been incredibly jubilant. Other people have been angry and depressed. There will be healing, eventually. But there's going to be a whole lot of tailless robins and sparrows in the streets of America after things calm down.
I am trying to move on. Regain some perspective. I cannot share in the beliefs that shaped the outcome of last Tuesday night. They don't represent who I am. I can't embrace a movement that is founded on bigotry and hatred. I believe in love and charity and acceptance. That's what being a Christian is all about.
Saint Marty gives thanks for the scars on his leg and neck. His nicks and bumps. They are reminders that healing happens. Slowly.
And a poem for this evening about seeing truth in the storm . . .
White Noise
by: Martin Achatz
It’s always in my ears
Thrush and blue jay in the forest
Fills the air
Indistinct as grains of sand
The way winter afternoon fills
Radio. Handel? Zeppelin? Kanye?
In the palm of a storm
Horn and siren, freight truck
With fat, silencing flakes
Voice, sharp as January
I absent it, let it quilt my day
Shit man, shit call me
Until all I hear through its
Phone, insistent as labor pains
Silence is what I choose
News of Libya and Iraq and Pakistan
To hear. White
A new planet, expanding. White
Bread baking in my oven
Fist of hurricane tearing up the Milky Way
Thursday, January 1, 2015
January 1: Sunlit Peaks, Book Club Party, Holiday Season
It is difficult to be religious, impossible to be merry, at every moment of life, and festivals are as sunlit peaks, testifying above dark valleys, to the eternal radiance.
-----Clement A. Miles
Oscar Hijuelos' Mr. Ives' Christmas begins with this quote. It gives you an idea of what the novel will be about: religion, Christmas, dark valleys, and sunlit peaks. It sets the tone of the book immediately.
I went to bed at 3 a.m. I got up at 7:30 a.m. I had to play the organ for a 9 a.m. mass. I have not been back to bed all day. Had to get my house ready for the Christmas party of my book club. Cleaning. Food prepping. Gift wrapping. It's one of my favorite nights of the holiday season.
Our book for this meeting was Charles Dickens' A Christmas Carol. It had been a while since I'd read it, so it was a nice stroll down memory lane. Three years ago, I spent a whole year with Scrooge and the spirits of Christmas, so I'm pretty familiar with every word, sentence, paragraph, and stave. And, of course, I have strong opinions about it.
The meeting is over now. I expressed all of my ideas. The chocolate fountain has been cleaned and put away, and the house is back to its normal state of entropy. The holidays really feel like they're drawing to a close tonight. It's such a letdown to return to normal life after the last two weeks of celebrations. There's really nothing special coming up, aside from my vacation next week. Not too many sunlit peaks in the future.
I'm going to miss the light and hope of December. I try to follow Scrooge's credo of keeping Christmas alive every day of the year, but, when the trees start coming down, it gets a little depressing. It's like the manger's empty and baby Jesus has gone on vacation to Disney World or something. He's M.I.A. Tomorrow morning, I have to take the decorations down at work. It's going to be depressing.
Saint Marty now has Lent to look forward to. Fa la la la la, la la la la.
-----Clement A. Miles
Oscar Hijuelos' Mr. Ives' Christmas begins with this quote. It gives you an idea of what the novel will be about: religion, Christmas, dark valleys, and sunlit peaks. It sets the tone of the book immediately.
I went to bed at 3 a.m. I got up at 7:30 a.m. I had to play the organ for a 9 a.m. mass. I have not been back to bed all day. Had to get my house ready for the Christmas party of my book club. Cleaning. Food prepping. Gift wrapping. It's one of my favorite nights of the holiday season.
Our book for this meeting was Charles Dickens' A Christmas Carol. It had been a while since I'd read it, so it was a nice stroll down memory lane. Three years ago, I spent a whole year with Scrooge and the spirits of Christmas, so I'm pretty familiar with every word, sentence, paragraph, and stave. And, of course, I have strong opinions about it.
The meeting is over now. I expressed all of my ideas. The chocolate fountain has been cleaned and put away, and the house is back to its normal state of entropy. The holidays really feel like they're drawing to a close tonight. It's such a letdown to return to normal life after the last two weeks of celebrations. There's really nothing special coming up, aside from my vacation next week. Not too many sunlit peaks in the future.
I'm going to miss the light and hope of December. I try to follow Scrooge's credo of keeping Christmas alive every day of the year, but, when the trees start coming down, it gets a little depressing. It's like the manger's empty and baby Jesus has gone on vacation to Disney World or something. He's M.I.A. Tomorrow morning, I have to take the decorations down at work. It's going to be depressing.
Saint Marty now has Lent to look forward to. Fa la la la la, la la la la.
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