Showing posts with label Matthew Gavin Frank. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Matthew Gavin Frank. Show all posts

Wednesday, March 10, 2021

March 10: Fecundity in Minute and Irrelevant Material, Matthew Gavin Frank, "Flight of the Diamond Smugglers"

 Thomas Merton writes of teaching a writing class at Columbia University . . .

That was also the season in which, three nights a week, I taught a class in English composition, in one of the rooms in the School of Business at Columbia. Like all Extension classes, it was a mixture of all flesh. There was a tough and bad-tempered chemist who was a center of potential opposition, because he was taking the course under duress—it was required of all the students who were following a systematic series of courses in anything at all. There was an earnest and sensitive Negro youth who sat in the front row, dressed in a neat grey suit, and peered at me intently through his glasses all the time the class was going on. There was an exchange student from the University of Rome, and there was one of those middle-aged ladies who had been taking courses like this for years and who handed in neat and punctilious themes and occupied, with a serene and conscious modesty, her rightful place as the star of the class. This entitled her to talk more than anybody else and ask more unpredictable questions. 

Once, after I had been insisting that they should stick to concrete and tangible evidence, in describing places and things, an Irishman called Finegan who had been sitting in bewilderment and without promise in one of the back rows, suddenly blossomed out with a fecundity in minute and irrelevant material detail that it was impossible to check. He began handing in descriptions of shoe factories that made you feel as if you were being buried under fifty tons of machinery. And I learned, with wonder and fear, that teachers have a mysterious and deadly power of letting loose psychological forces in the minds of the young. The rapidity, the happy enthusiasm with which they responded to hints and suggestions—but with the wrong response—was enough to make a man run away and live in the woods.

I love Merton's description of giving writers nudges and suggestions, and said writers launching into descriptions of shoe factories and Himalayas of machinery.  Unpredictable questions that make the future monk want to flee to the forest and live like John the Baptist on grasshoppers and pinecones.  For me, that is writing at its best--when it slaps you in the face like a startled pigeon wing.

A couple nights ago, I finished reading Flight of the Diamond Smugglers:  A Tale of Pigeons, Obsession, and Greed Along Coastal South Africa by Matthew Gavin Frank, a book that is part Homeric odyssey/part memoir/part contemplation on loss and grief.  It's the sort of story that defies categorization, refuses to be pinned down.  Like its titular diamond-smuggling avians, the pages fly off in wild pursuit of mysterious destinations, guided only by a kind of inner mytho-magnetic GPS system.

On the surface, Flight of the Diamond Smugglers is a historical and contemporary exploration of the ruthless De Beers diamond industry in South Africa, from infancy to violent conglomerate monstrosity.  Yet, the book begins with Frank and his wife, Louisa, huddled on the edge of the Big Hole, "a gaping open-pit and underground diamond mine that was active from 1871 to 1914 . . . a man-made Grand Canyon."  It is into this abyss that they empty a thermos containing the ashes of a lost child.  Their sixth miscarriage.  Frank recites Kaddish, and his wife whispers "Amen," as this tiny ghost swirls to the bottom of the hole.

From this ceremony, Frank launches into a narrative that spans the wasted coasts of South Africa, to Orpheus and the Underworld, to Krishna's cursed Koh-i-Noor diamond.  It's a ride that takes wild turns.  Isaac Newton and a wooden pigeon.  Middle school Champagne Snowball dance and midnight meeting with a security demigod.  Just when you think you see the destination ahead, Flight of the Diamond Smugglers finds an updraft or trade wind, and you go sailing into another gleaming facet or bottomless mine.

Stitching the book together, like a recurring motif in a symphony, are lyrical "Bartholomew Variations," Frank meditating on a particular diamond smuggling pigeon (Bartholomew) owned by a young mine worker (Msizi).  The veins of these small sections carry the blood of the book to its heart.  Through Msizi and his bird, Frank is able to humanize a story that, most of the time, seems inhuman, even otherworldly.  And, by doing this, he transforms the book into something personal, alive, heartbreaking.

Matthew Gavin Frank is a master of juxtaposition, throwing all of these disparate elements--grief and greed, desperation and diamonds--into a tale that, ultimately, ends the way all stories about carrier pigeons end.  With another long flight, another winding journey, through a dung-beetle night, toward a distant, waiting home.

Saint Marty thinks you should book passage on this trip.  You won't be disappointed.

Sunday, March 5, 2017

March 5: Octavia Spencer, Idols, Classic Saint Marty

This afternoon, I went to see a movie with my daughter.  The Shack.  I read the book many years ago, used it in a Sunday school class I used to teach.  It's not the most subtle of stories, but I still found the film incredibly moving.  It reduced me to a puddle of tears quite a few times.  And it helped me revise my image of God.

There are people who have problems with artistic depictions of God, whether in movies or television shows or paintings or statues.  These people object on the grounds that the artists are making idols.  Having grown up in the Catholic faith, I have been exposed to artistic representations of God and Jesus and the Bible my whole life.

Believe or not, I know that God is not the bearded white dude on the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel.  I also know that God is not Octavia Spencer, cooking up biscuits in the kitchen.  But I would also argue that God is Octavia Spencer.  And Sam Worthington.  And Jack Nicholson.  I was taught that everyone is a reflection of God.  Therefore, when I look into the face of Octavia Spencer, I am, in essence, looking into one of the faces of God.

Sorry to get so philosophical on a Sunday evening.  Let me end this discussion by telling you to see The Shack.  It is worth the cry.

Tonight's episode of Classic Saint Marty first aired a year ago and deals with a good friend with a big problem . . .

March 5, 2016:  A Pact, Ted, Matthew Gavin Frank, "Antebellum"

The world has signed a pact with the devil; it had to.  It is a covenant to which every thing, even every hydrogen atom, is bound.  The terms are clear:  if you want to live, you have to die; you cannot have mountains and creeks without space, and space is a beauty married to a blind man.  The blind man is Freedom, or Time, and he does not go anywhere without his great dog Death.  The world came into being with the signing of the contract.  A scientist calls it the Second Law of Thermodynamics.  A poet says, "The force that through the green fuse drives the flower / Drives my green age."  This is what we know.  The rest is gravy.

The world is a tough place.  As Dillard says, this little piece of rock we live on signed a deal with the devil.  From the day we are born, we are dying.  Freedom.  Time.  Death.  These are our constant companions.  And in the time we have on this planet, we must struggle, relax, mourn, rejoice.  That's what our green age is all about.

I have a friend right now who is in the struggle phase of his green age.  "Ted" has recently admitted to his physician that he has an addiction to prescription narcotics.  As expected, Ted's doctor will not prescribe Ted any more painkillers, and Ted is hurting, psychologically (mainly) and physically.  He's convinced himself that the only thing that will relieve his condition is a narcotic.

I know that Ted is hurting.  Addiction is a terrible thing.  It's debilitating, affecting work and family and health.  It's something that literally controls every waking moment of every day.  I feel terrible for Ted.  Yet, Ted has taken the first step to recovery:  admitting that he has a problem.  Now, he needs to follow through.  Get the help he needs.

I wish that life wasn't full of struggle.  I wish that Ted didn't have any pain.  That his back didn't hurt.  That he didn't have family problems and finance problems and work problems.  Aside from the back problems, I could be Ted.  We all could be Ted.  That's Dillard's point, I think.  The world is all about entropy, the gradual decline into disorder.  That's Ted's story right now.  That's all our stories.

When you read this post, think about Ted.  About yourself.  About the world.  We've all signed on the dotted line.  I like to think, however, that the contract is with God instead of the devil.  There is the blind man, Freedom or Time, and his faithful dog, Death.  But God sends us other companions, as well.  Joy.  Relaxation.  Surprise.  Love.

Saint Marty and Ted need to party with those dudes a little more, and maybe have a steak dinner every once in a while with Matt Gavin Frank . . .

Antebellum

by:  Matthew Gavin Frank

The tornado inside Adromeda laid seeds
of clover in the sky.  We took the stubble
and dissolved it in the red wine, went into
the basement of the Genome Biology Building
for asylum.

Helene had gone to a funeral that Sunday--
the body of her first lover covered
in tobacco.  She said
that in burial
the screws of the corpse meet a pressure
of any blood not cleaned out,
they shoot into dirt like seeds.  The arms
quickly flare like a chicken's,
and in the downdraft of soil
the teeth clench as if to keep
the earth out.  He was finally rhetorical, she said.

Ernie spat on the floor, unwrapped the stolen corn
from the napkin, saying, "You saw
no such thing, Helene.,"  When I was small,
Helene said, I stood with my father
at Mount Hope Cemetery.  He was fresh
with mind and antebellum.  The crops
were rotting because of the windy season,
we pricked out fingers and let them drip
onto newspaper.  Alice, in a complicated

white dress, with the tornado dropping,
feigned a seizure and wiped
her cheek through the blood.
The rows of clay idols watched

and started to tip in the wind.  Over us,
these shuddering memorials:
A rooster smothering a swallow
and behind us, two dogs

tugging-of-war with a chrysalis,
and an angel cradling a squirrel
between her breasts.  She watched
the rooster tie the swallow in a knot
and in the quake, began
to step over the wind like a plot.


Because I could not stop for Death . . .
A poem of peace for tonight:



Surviving the Bomb

by:  Martin Achatz

At 2 a.m., I wake from dreams, nauseous,
Sweaty as my daughter’s breaking fever,
Convinced I was in Hiroshima just after
Little Boy detonated in resurrection light,
The air, wave after wave of heat, took
Breath and buildings away, left
Skeletons, black fingers pointing
Heavenward, at the ascended Jesus,
At God, accusations blasted into skin,
Kimono flowers, leaves,
Fat keloid blossoms across spine, shoulder.
I rise, stumble to kitchen, sit on floor,
Remind myself of date, year, time.
Over and over.  August 6.  1945.  8:15 a.m.
A prayer.  A chant.  To bring me back.
My fridge.  My table.  My house.
My life.  I swim, kick to surface,
The cells of my body not weak
With charged atom, not in process
Of firestorm, decay.  I breathe
Breaths, hear my son cry out
In his crib.  My son.  My daughter.
My wife.  I remain in darkness, aware
Of winter air on my arms and legs.
Grateful.  I think of how Hiroshima,
One month after, cracked, opened
With goosefoot, morning glories, sesame,
Spanish bayonets and day lilies,
How ash and bones grew green,
Everywhere, grass, bean, weed.
Green, green, green.  Everywhere.  Green.

Saturday, March 5, 2016

March 5: A Pact, Ted, Matthew Gavin Frank, "Antebellum"

The world has signed a pact with the devil; it had to.  It is a covenant to which every thing, even every hydrogen atom, is bound.  The terms are clear:  if you want to live, you have to die; you cannot have mountains and creeks without space, and space is a beauty married to a blind man.  The blind man is Freedom, or Time, and he does not go anywhere without his great dog Death.  The world came into being with the signing of the contract.  A scientist calls it the Second Law of Thermodynamics.  A poet says, "The force that through the green fuse drives the flower / Drives my green age."  This is what we know.  The rest is gravy.

The world is a tough place.  As Dillard says, this little piece of rock we live on signed a deal with the devil.  From the day we are born, we are dying.  Freedom.  Time.  Death.  These are our constant companions.  And in the time we have on this planet, we must struggle, relax, mourn, rejoice.  That's what our green age is all about.

I have a friend right now who is in the struggle phase of his green age.  "Ted" has recently admitted to his physician that he has an addiction to prescription narcotics.  As expected, Ted's doctor will not prescribe Ted any more painkillers, and Ted is hurting, psychologically (mainly) and physically.  He's convinced himself that the only thing that will relieve his condition is a narcotic.

I know that Ted is hurting.  Addiction is a terrible thing.  It's debilitating, affecting work and family and health.  It's something that literally controls every waking moment of every day.  I feel terrible for Ted.  Yet, Ted has taken the first step to recovery:  admitting that he has a problem.  Now, he needs to follow through.  Get the help he needs.

I wish that life wasn't full of struggle.  I wish that Ted didn't have any pain.  That his back didn't hurt.  That he didn't have family problems and finance problems and work problems.  Aside from the back problems, I could be Ted.  We all could be Ted.  That's Dillard's point, I think.  The world is all about entropy, the gradual decline into disorder.  That's Ted's story right now.  That's all our story.

When you read this post, think about Ted.  About yourself.  About the world.  We've all signed on the dotted line.  I like to think, however, that the contract is with God instead of the devil.  There is the blind man, Freedom or Time, and his faithful dog, Death.  But God sends us other companions, as well.  Joy.  Relaxation.  Surprise.  Love.

Saint Marty and Ted need to party with those dudes a little more, and maybe have a steak dinner every once in a while with Matt Gavin Frank . . .

Antebellum

by:  Matthew Gavin Frank

The tornado inside Adromeda laid seeds
of clover in the sky.  We took the stubble
and dissolved it in the red wine, went into
the basement of the Genome Biology Building
for asylum.

Helene had gone to a funeral that Sunday--
the body of her first lover covered
in tobacco.  She said
that in burial
the screws of the corpse meet a pressure
of any blood not cleaned out,
they shoot into dirt like seeds.  The arms
quickly flare like a chicken's,
and in the downdraft of soil
the teeth clench as if to keep
the earth out.  He was finally rhetorical, she said.

Ernie spat on the floor, unwrapped the stolen corn
from the napkin, saying, "You saw
no such thing, Helene.,"  When I was small,
Helene said, I stood with my father
at Mount Hope Cemetery.  He was fresh
with mind and antebellum.  The crops
were rotting because of the windy season,
we pricked out fingers and let them drip
onto newspaper.  Alice, in a complicated

white dress, with the tornado dropping,
feigned a seizure and wiped
her cheek through the blood.
The rows of clay idols watched

and started to tip in the wind.  Over us,
these shuddering memorials:
A rooster smothering a swallow
and behind us, two dogs

tugging-of-war with a chrysalis,
and an angel cradling a squirrel
between her breasts.  She watched
the rooster tie the swallow in a knot
and in the quake, began
to step over the wind like a plot.

Because I could not stop for Death . . .

Friday, March 4, 2016

March 4: Blood Fluke, Deep Breath, Matthew Gavin Frank, "Illinois Witches"

Other creatures have it just about as easy.  A blood fluke starts out as an egg in human feces.  If it happens to fall into fresh water it will live only if it happens to encounter a certain species of snail.  It changes in the snail, swims out, and now needs to find a human being in the water in order to bore through his skin.  It travels around in the man's blood, settles down in the blood vessels of his intestine, and turns into a sexually mature blood fluke, either male or female.  Now it has to find another fluke, of the opposite sex, who also just happens to have traveled the same circuitous route and landed in the same unfortunate man's intestinal blood vessels.  Other flukes lead similarly improbable lives, some passing through as many as four hosts.

Yes, it's a weird, disgusting paragraph.  Blood flukes and human feces.  Snails and hosts.  I love strange facts, things that other people find repulsive or simply unbelievable.  Reading the above passage makes me realize that the world is infinitely adaptable.  Blood flukes will find a way to grow, mature, and reproduce, even in the absence of a pile of shit.

I have been in a strange mood all day.  That's why I chose the blood fluke paragraph from Annie Dillard, and the Matt Frank poem below about witches and slaughter.  It's Friday night.  For the past five days, I have been forced into normalcy by my job.  Patients in a medical office do not want to be greeted by a poet with a blog.  They want a smiling face of a person who makes them feel safe and comfortable.

Tonight, I don't have to be safe and comfortable.  Tomorrow, I don't have to be safe and comfortable (except when I'm at church).  Ditto Sunday.  When I left work this afternoon, I practically ran out of the building.  When I got outside, I stopped and took a really deep breath, probably the deepest breath I've taken all week.

Yes, I still have work to do this weekend.  Bathrooms to clean.  Papers to grade.  Things to post for my online class.  But, for some reason, I still feel freer, as if I'm living inside that deep breath.  I'm ready to let go, relax.  And correct papers.  And scrub toilets.  And vacuum rugs.

Hey, Saint Marty is a blood fluking party animal.

Illinois Witches

by:  Matthew Gavin Frank

Broom of hackberry,
dormancy on the lawn.

We don't yet realize
we can eat the mildew,

test the buds
for their sugar.

Where the corn is now, sixteen women
were slaughtered with a scythe in 1806,
the symptoms of sweetness and a burlap rope.
They used farming as an excuse . . .

We all die forward,
the multiplex in Savoy

lighting our bloods
in pink.  Up close,

we look like the short-twigs
of some secondary plant.

The men who laid this field
lit their oil and read how, throughout the Midwest,
the softest of the mites tie themselves
in the shoots, lay their eggs in May.

They read and rename
auditoriums after the breasts

of their founders' wives.
We have since been looking

for a broom-free species.
The reports call us, aesthetically unpleasant.

Until they sprayed us with sulfur,
we had food on our plates, barrettes
in our hair.  We saw the star in the oak wilt.
Imagined the tunnel that, one day, boys

must walk through
after their classes,

ignoring the plots,
all the way to the Locust

Street tracks.  We give them
peanut shells on the bottoms

of their shoes, beetles in their hands.
We give them their long walk,
a fucking sunset before them, trains
on either side.


Thursday, March 3, 2016

March 3: Waiting for Worms, Dreams, Matthew Gavin Frank, "Mirrors"

I am a sacrifice bound with cords to the horns of the world's rock altar, waiting for worms.  I take a deep breath, I open my eyes.  Looking, I see there are worms in the horns of the altar like live maggots in amber, there are shells of worms in the rock and moths flapping at my eyes.  A wind from noplace rises.  A sense of the real exults me; the cords loose; I walk on my way.

Dillard spends an entire chapter of Pilgrim at Tinker Creek talking about snakes and seals and mosquitoes and fleas.  Predators and parasites.  Victims and victimizers.  The world is based on this dynamic:  we are all part of a food chain.  Mosquitoes feed on snakes (at least in Dillard's book).  Spiders feed on mosquitoes.  Birds feed on spiders.  Bigger birds feed on smaller birds.  You get the idea.  We are all bound with cords to the horns of the rock altar, on our way to the worms.

I know that's not a very comforting thought.  But I'm not going to reflect on death or mortality in this post.  I have been in a strange melancholy state for most of this week.  I sat at my desk in the medical office today, and I felt a little trapped.  Not because of the job.  Or my coworkers.  It's the fact that I seem to be facing the same struggles every day of my life.

I wish I could be like Dillard at the end of the above passage.  I want the cords to loose; I want to walk on my way.  Those cords are pretty strong.  I have a lot of people who depend on me.  A wife and kids.  Students.  Family.  I'm not able to simply chuck it all, quit my jobs, and say "I'm going to write the great American novel" or "I'm going to be the next David Foster Wallace" (without the suicidal tendencies).  I can't do that.

I know people who have lived their dreams.  My friend, Matt Gavin Frank, for instance.  He left home at 17, traveled the world, from Alaska to Italy.  Then he went to school and studied writing.  Now, he's a famous writer.  His books are reviewed in Entertainment Weekly and The Paris Review.  This isn't envy I'm expressing.  Matt works his ass off all the time.  But he's doing exactly what he wants to do.  What he's dreamed of doing.

Most days, Saint Marty is just too tired to even think about his dreams.

Mirrors

by:  Matthew Gavin Frank

The mosquito wrinkles against the glass, bites
at its own reflection.  My sister wonders
if it sees itself as the bear trapped in its blue

image, the bite of rusted aluminum at its ankles,
think as quicksand.  My sister begins a story
about handcuffs and brass bedposts, then

remembers I'm her brother.  I glance
at her wrists, looking for scars.  Someone
should tell us not to think so much about

the mosquito, not to clap our hands on its flight,
igniting the small firecracker of God-knows-
whose blood onto our palms, not to close

our fronds over the wrists of another.
Sometimes, someone should tell us, the wrists
will maneuver a harmonica over a bearded

man's lip.  Sometimes the sound of a harmonica
played by one's father is gargantuan, explosive
as a firecracker, especially if one's mother

has locked herself into the bedroom again,
threatening to burn all of the paperbacks.
He wouldn't care, but he needs to know

the endings.  It is only the beginnings that matter
to her.  Soon, they will put down their instruments,
find the time to make love six times before the last

few pages.  A brother will hold his sister's hand
at their closed door, as I may hold my sister's,
wishing it was a book of matches.  The air

will be heavy with trying rain, and we
will ask of it, before it falls:  Tell us our names
will be carried on in the saliva of mosquitoes,

our holes will be mended with simple needle
and thread.  And tell us also, that our parents
will never die.

Sometimes it takes an act of God . . .

Wednesday, March 2, 2016

March 2: Mrs. Mildred Sink, Telling Stories, Matthew Gavin Frank, "Kepler's Last Law"

One day I was talking about snakes to Mrs. Mildred Sink, who operates a switchboard.  A large pane separated us, and we were talking through a circular hole in the glass.  She was seated in a dark room little bigger than a booth.  As we talked, red lights on her desk would flash.  She would glance at them, then back at me, and, finishing her point with careful calmness, she would fix on me a long, significant look to hold my attention while her hand expertly sought the button and pushed it.  In this way she handled incoming calls and told me her snake story.

When she was a girl, she lived in the country just north of here.  She had a brother four years old.  One bright summer day her brother and her mother were sitting quietly in the big room of the log cabin.  Her mother had her sewing in her lap and was bent over it in concentration.  The little boy was playing with wooden blocks on the floor.  "Ma," he said, "I saw a snake."  "Where?"  "Down by the spring."  The woman stitched the hem of a cotton dress, gathering the material with her needle and drawing it smooth with her hand.  The little boy piled his blocks carefully, this way and that.  After a while he said, "Ma, it's too dark in here.  I can't see."  She looked up and the boy's leg was swollen up as big around as his body.

Mrs. Sink nodded at me emphatically and then heeded the flashing light on the panel before her.  She turned away; this caller was taking time.  I waved and caught her eye; she waved, and I left.

Yes, I know that's a incredibly long passage.  But the story is so good.  The way that Dillard sets it up, talking with Mrs. Sink through a hole in a window.  The tale of the snake, starting so innocently and ending with that image:  the four-year-old boy dying in front of his mother.  (Make no mistake--the boy died.)  It's thrilling and terrifying to read at the same time.  And then Mrs. Sink just goes back to the switchboard.

I love a good story.  Right now, I am sitting in my office at the university.  It is spring break, so I believe that I'm probably the only person in the English Department.  It's almost 7 p.m.  I have been here about an hour and a half, doing work for the online class I'm taking.  (The instructor of the class told me the class would take about five hours per week.  I think I spent five hours just doing the week's readings.  This is going be a loooooong class.)

Whenever I'm in the English Department in the evening, I think of my friend, Ray, who used to the be the Department Head.  You may remember that Ray died of a massive heart attack the night before Thanksgiving in 2014.  Well, he's on my mind a lot when I'm sitting in my office.  For many people, Ray was the English Department.  A generous, funny, fair man.  He loved this place.

And thinking of Ray makes me think of my sister, Sally, who passed away in August, 2015.  I miss both of these people a great deal.  Ray was a part of my life for almost 25 years.  Sal wasn't just my sister.  She was my boss for 17 years.  Ten hours a day, we were together.  I sometimes still expect to see her car parked in its normal spot when I go to work.  She always parked in the same place.

I remember the first day I went to work after my sister died.  I was standing by a window, staring out into the parking lot, and I swear I saw my sister walking in the distance, wearing her blue hoodie and blue scrubs.  I looked once, looked away.  When I looked back, she was gone.

The first night that I was in my office at the university after Ray died, I was absorbed in some task at my desk.  The lights in the English Department are motion-activated.  After about ten minutes of inactivity, they turn off.  The hallway that night had been dark for quite some time.  As I was sitting at my desk, I felt like somebody was standing by my office door.  I looked up.  Nobody was there.  Suddenly, the hallway lights went on.  I got up and walked to my door.  Nobody was in the hallway.

You may be wondering why I'm telling you these stories.  Snakes.  Death.  Ghosts.  Well, first, I like telling stories about my friend and my sister.  It makes me feel like they're still with me in a way.  Second, I've been a little melancholy this afternoon, thinking about where I am right now in my life.  Third, I'm procrastinating about grading some papers.  The longer I make this post, the longer I can put off picking up my red pen.

The light just went out in the hallway of the English Department,  It's a little after seven in the evening now.  I'm sure the sun has set, and the cold night is getting colder. 

Saint Marty can no longer avoid the inevitable end of this post, except with a poem...

Kepler's Last Law

by:  Matthew Gavin Frank

The gargoyles with their frosted hair
guard the entrance to the library.

They are brother and sister, coffee-
stained, their muscular necks, things

under which teenagers still kiss
reading up with flapping fingers

to write their names.  From below,
my sister tells me, a fang is only

a small circle, a picture of the sun
in the central color pages

of a children's book about astronomy--
the one my mother bought me,

my seventh birthday, hoping
I wold go into the sciences,

unearth the skull of some Midwestern
dinosaur, polish it like a pearl.

Tell her that, in every cornfield,
is an ellipse that cries when it moos.

This is, after all, a law
of conservation, the orbit of her hand

as she bakes mandelbrot with chocolate chips
for the holidays, the finished scones

cooling on a sheet pan subject
to the hard gravitation

of room temperature.  Their smoke
loses itself in the space of a yellow

chandelier, the small extinction
of heat.  My sister,

angry after I dropped her
dollhouse family down the bathroom sink,

burned my book in the snow,
the chapter on Mars having outlasted

the fattest of the Jovians, the unspeakable
cold of the milk.  I knew even then

that she changed my life,
that my heart was not a good one--

a silk handkerchief, a bony
hand--an argument with genetics

I could not win, my body
stubbornly Aristotelian, still believing that it,

like the Earth used to be, was a fulcrum.
(Kepler knows:  here, an eraser is hard

to come by).
This pressure on my throat,

tightening now as I turn my back
on food, pass into pages, must be

my daughter, unborn, writing her name
on my breath.

Somewhere, in warm, warm, kitchens . . .

The hardest thing the Earth asks of us,
with its smells of white flour, requires

not the tractor, but remembering.

Yes, another weird cartoon to laugh at . . .

Tuesday, March 1, 2016

March 1: Killer Whale, Scars, Matthew Gavin Frank, "For Weather"

Finally, Paul Siple, the Antarctic explorer and scientist, writes of the Antarctic crab-eater seal, which lives in the pack ice off the continent:  "One seldom finds a sleek silver adult crab-eater that does not bear ugly scars--or two-foot long parallel slashes--on each side of its body, received when it managed somehow to wriggle out of the jaws of a killer whale that had seized it."

Dillard writes about close calls.  Crab-eater seals that somehow elude the jaws of killer whales.  Well, actually, they don't elude killer whales.  They somehow escape from them.  Imagine the opening scenes of Jaws, when the naked woman has her close encounter with Bruce the shark.  Now, imagine the naked woman out-kicking or out-swimming or out-thrashing Bruce and becoming a Playboy centerfold (when Playboy still had centerfolds) instead of brunch.

Of course, the crab-eaters don't escape harm.  They are scarred for life.  I think everyone who reaches a certain age bears scars.  I have them.  My killer whales have been mental illness, addiction, finances, and Donald Trump, to name a few.  Killer whales are simply a part of life.  I've faced killer whales at school, work, my home. 

Right now, my killer whale is professional.  For the last several weeks, I have been struggling at my job.  It's a matter of motivation and enthusiasm.  I have neither right now.  I've just been passed up in the medical office where I work for yet another promotion.  I've applied for another position, and I think I've missed out on that one, as well.  Therefore, I'm a little . . . scarred.

I told my wife the other day that I feel a little unappreciated.  I work hard.  Every day.  I do my best, try to remain positive all the time.  My supervisors tell my how much they love my attitude.  "You're always so happy," a coworker said to me last week.  This week, I'm struggling to find a smile.  I've been faking it--and fooling almost everyone.

That's my current killer whale defense:  smiling, no matter what.  It doesn't necessarily put me in a better state of mind, but it keeps people from asking difficult questions like "is something wrong?" and "are you alright?"  People don't want honest answers.

So, Saint Marty has been smiling a lot this week.  A lot.

For Weather

by:  Matthew Gavin Frank

The diner is closed today
for weather, a paper sign

on the door, the parking lot
unplowed, the trains

derailed at Mason City
because of the ice.  That noise

could have been deer
folding into the fields

while the Monticello
Boys Choir sang

in the auditorium
about messenger angels.  But what

is ceremony without coffee,
pancakes wet with butter,

frozen blueberries, spatulas
greased with this morning's

eggs, while someone crouches
outside in corn, hiding prayer

beneath her blue sweatshirt,
the whispers of farm

against farm, conspiring
to unzip Illinois?

The same man who
discovered margarine

named his daughter
after a white flower.

In the south garden,
bearing his name, the cows

lose their legs in deep snow,
eating down to the exhausted grass

and the frozen lowing things
that uphold it.  In this,

we find our can openers
and turn the heat so high,

the air filling with such expectation
it could be the new year.

Speaking of sharks and killer whales . . .

Thursday, December 3, 2015

December 3: The Pamphlet, The Mad Feast, Peter Thabit Jones, "Later," Off the Top of My Head

The pamphlet was resting on his lap the night he and Robert attended the lecture by its author, the two sitting in the back of an auditorium of an Upper East Side school.  The auditorium was full, the crowd largely female, divided into two general groups--rather affluent elderly women who may have had a real craving for an insight into the next world, and much younger, sharp-looking women, college students for the most part, Ives concluded...

At one point, Ives becomes a lecture junkie.  He attends any talk given by spiritualists, reincarnationists, psychic societies, and holy men.  He's searching for answers.  After a near death experience, Ives experiences a mystical vision that he doesn't understand.  Colored winds and spinning suns over Madison Avenue.  Nothing from Ives' past unlocks the meaning of the vision.  So Ives decides to explore any explanation, no matter how ridiculous. Thus, he finds himself in auditoriums, listening to presentations on astral projection and past lives and love in the hereafter.  All in pursuit of truth.

I attended a "lecture" given by a friend of mine this evening.  His new book was just released last month, so the local library invited him to read from it.  Matthew Gavin Frank and The Mad Feast.  Matt is a fantastic performer, and the room was packed.  People were lined up along the back wall. 

Matt teaches in the MFA program at the university.  He teaches graduate classes in creative nonfiction and poetry.  His books get reviewed in Entertainment Weekly and The Paris Review.  Over Christmas break, he's traveling to Greece to participate in a conference.  In the past three years, he's published three books.

It was a good night.  I saw some friends that I hadn't seen in quite a while.  I got to hear Matt tell some really good stories.  The only thing missing was a little alcohol and pizza.

Saint Marty is tired.  And hungry.  Ready for a long winter's nap.

Later

by:  Peter Thabit Jones

Later, at the table,
From a stockpile of old thoughts,
A bundle of dry words
And yesterday's dark news,
A poem catches fire.

Off the Top of My Head


Monday, September 8, 2014

September 8: Poet of the Week, Matthew Gavin Frank, Music, "Types of Symphony"

I had no idea until this morning who I was going to choose as Poet of the Week.  Usually, by Friday or Saturday, I have an idea.  This time, I literally stood in front of my book shelf at 4:30 a.m. and just scanned my shelves.  My eyes stopped on a collection by Matthew Gavin Frank.  I scanned the shelves again.  Back to Matt's book.  Third time, same result.

Thus, the Poet of the Week is Matthew Gavin Frank.

If you have been reading this blog for any length of time, you already know my affection for Matt's work.  He is, simply, a fantastic writer.  On top of all that, he's a really decent guy.  Down-to-earth.  Funny as hell.  Somebody you want to have a beer with, which I have done on more than one occasion.

The first poem I've chosen to share with you comes from his newest collection, The Morrow Plots.  I've already written a review of this book, talked about its strange, dark beauty.  Today's selection is slightly lighter than most of the poems.  If the rest of the book is ebony, this poem is dusk.

It's about the music of life, the way I read it.  There's music in everything.  The chicken sandwich you eat for dinner.  The smell of skunk in the early morning dew.  Sour milk in the fridge.  Everything contributes notes, chords, phrases of light and dark.  Melodies heavy and tripping.

Saint Marty could listen to this "song" all night.

Types of Symphony

by:  Matthew Gavin Frank

When the sun rises behind the black
                                                                cow, everything
around the cow brightens.  This

is the rule.  The milk pails

upturned by the night,
the river, the landowner in bed
                                                     biting his lip.  No one is exempt.  The wife

who has pulled their daughter awake
by her hair.  In her scalp, needlmarks
                                                                            of blood struggle

against her skin, nothing
                                 a hairbrush can fix,
nothing to undo the know.
I don't know what to make of this
                                                                          as I wake next to you,

your neck steeped in days-old panache,
the kind of perfume a shower

does nothing to wash away.  I can't tell
if the cow is a sign of doom
                                                    or hope,

if the landowner's teeth
are too weak to break the skin.

                                                          Your answer isn't
an answer at all, but more
of an aubade, your fingers, in sleep, reaching
                                                                                      for the piano

in the blankets,

your voice like the cow's to the world
                                                                           to every hairbrush
not picked up, to the boy who,

in the back of a barn,

handles his first gun.  Sleep,
like some rough draft of God
                                                                 still engaged in the nonviolent

act of dove-making.

It's beautiful music
               

Friday, August 8, 2014

August 7: Zuckerman's Swing, Kid Paradise, I. O. U.

Mothers for miles around worried about Zuckerman's swing.  They feared some child would fall off.  But no child ever did.  Children almost always hang onto things tighter than their parents think they will.

Zuckerman's swing is basically a rope tied to a roof beam in the barn.  By modern safety standards, it sounds like a head injury waiting to happen, but Fern and Avery climb to the hayloft and launch themselves on the rope over and over without serious bodily harm.  E. B. White is correct.  Children do hang onto things tighter than parents expect.

The resort I'm at is a kid paradise.  It has a water park and candy shops and toy stores.  There are mountain bike trails and zip lines.  My daughter, son, and nephew have had a great day.  I have been dropped, swirled, and drowned in many a water slide and pool.  I have ridden a ski chair lift to the top of a mountain.  Twice.  I've seen magic shows.  Made s'mores.  Eaten so much pizza that I'm going to have indigestion for a week.  Like I said, kid paradise.

On Thursdays, I'm supposed to talk about the latest book I'm reading.  I had every intention of fulfilling this obligation.  I'm reading a great book-length essay about the giant squid (it's much better than that very brief, mundane description).  Unfortunately, my day in kid paradise has curtailed my plans to review this work.  Therefore, I'm giving you an I.O.U.  In the near future, I will be discussing Preparing the Ghost by Matthew Gavin Frank.

Saint Marty promises.

Hold on tight and don't scream!