February 16: Radio City, Joseph Girzone, "Joshua," New Cartoon

...Then, after him, they had this Christmas thing they have at Radio City every year.  All these angels start coming out of the boxes and everywhere , guys carrying crucifixes and stuff all over the place, and the whole bunch of them--thousands of them--singing "Come All Ye Faithfull" like mad.  Big deal.  It's supposed to be religious as hell, I know, and very pretty and all, but I can't see anything religious or pretty, for God's sake, about a bunch of actors carrying crucifixes all over the stage.  When they were all finished and started going out the boxes again, you could tell they could hardly wait to get a cigarette or something.  I saw it with old Sally Hayes the year before, and she kept saying how beautiful it was, the costumes and all.  I said old Jesus probably would've puked if He could see it--all those fancy costumes and all.  Sally said I was a sacrilegious atheist.  I probably am...

I'm not sure Holden is far off in the above passage about Jesus.  The Jesus I read about in the Bible isn't about show and fireworks and smoke.  He isn't a rock star or a Radio City Rockette.  When big crowds gathered around to hear Him, He spoke His mind, told them what He wanted to tell them, and then He usually slipped away to some place quiet to pray or meditate or rest.  There's a whole lot about Jesus that Holden really gets.  Holden knows Jesus isn't a phony bastard, full of Himself and His power.


Today, I want to talk about another guy who gets Jesus. Joseph Girzone is a retired Catholic priest and author of the book Joshua.  I first read this novel around 1986 or '87.  I was an undergraduate in college and not very religious.  Like any twenty-something, I was interested in more important things, like girls and clothes and sex and movies and music.  Jesus wasn't something I thought about very much, even though I played the organ for Mass every weekend.

Girzone's Joshua is a parable almost.  It's about the second coming of Christ, but Christ doesn't descend from the clouds after a nuclear holocaust and reaping of souls.  No, Joshua (Girzone's Jesus) moves into a cabin on the edge of the little town of Auburn and slowly, quietly goes about his business.  He makes friends.  He does carpentry.  And he changes the lives of everybody he meets.  In one memorable passage, he talks to the local Catholic bishop about Jesus' beliefs on religion:

"Jesus was not interested in religion as you understand it.  For you religion is the passing on of finely chiseled doctrines and rigid codes of behavior.  For Jesus religion was finding God and enjoying freedom of being close to God--seeing Him in all creation, especially in God's children.  Perfecting those relationships was Jesus' understanding of religion.  In the mind of Jesus the Church's great concern should be to foster people's relationship with God and show people how to work together, caring for one another and building trust and love among the families of nations."

Yes, some of Girzone's prose reads a little like a sermon, but the story of Joshua inspired me in the mid '80s to revisit my ideas and beliefs about Jesus and religion.  It made me see Jesus as a real guy, simple, full of grace and love.   Eventually, Joshua ends in Rome with Joshua having a conversation with the Pope, whom he calls Peter.  I won't tell you the outcome of that audience, but I will say that when the conclave of cardinals meets in the Vatican at the beginning of March to choose the next Bishop of Rome, they would all do well to read Girzone's novel first.

Joshua also does something else for me:  it makes me feel peaceful.  In Girzone's portrait of Jesus/Joshua, I find a man-God who is a friend, protector, and healer.  It may sound crazy, but this slim little book reads like a fifth Gospel to me.  It may be a little corny and preachy at times, but it's also inspiring and deeply moving.

Saint Marty can get behind the Gospel of Girzone.

Confessions of Saint Marty

February 11: Pope Benedict Resigns, Pope Bubba I, "Rye" Dip

This morning, Pope Benedict announced that he was resigning from the papacy, effective February 28.  That means that by Easter, there will be a new pontiff.

Of course, Benedict's announcement came as a huge surprise.  A pope hasn't resigned since the Middle Ages.  The press immediately connected the announcement to the priest sex abuse scandals that have been plaguing the Catholic Church.  However, that mess began before Joseph Ratzinger became Pope Benedict XVI.  Nope, I think the reason is much simpler.  As his official statement said, he noticed that his strength had deteriorated over recent months "to the extent that I have had to recognize my incapacity to adequately fulfill the ministry entrusted to me...For this reason, and well aware of the seriousness of this act, with full freedom I declare that I renounce the ministry of Bishop of Rome, Successor of Saint Peter."  To put it simply, he's getting old and tired.

Early this morning, I e-mailed my pastor friend in Roscommon with my decision, and now I'm going to make it official:  I'm declaring my intention to throw my name into the ring.  I intend to be the next Bishop of Rome.  I've even picked out my name:  Pope Bubba I.  Kinda catchy, I think.

Before you snort coffee through your nose, I must point out that the rules don't say you have to be a cardinal or archbishop or bishop to be elected pope.  You don't even have to be a priest.  You just have to be a practicing Catholic male in good standing.  The last time I checked, I meet those requirements.  I'm a Catholic; I go to mass; and I have a penis.

All kidding aside, I sort of admire Benedict for recognizing his diminishing capacity to fulfill the duties of the papal office.  While I'm more liberal in my theological thinking, I think the German Shepherd has done a lot of good in the seven years he's led the Church.

But now it's Pope Bubba's turn.

It is Monday, and so it's time for a Rye Dip.  My question for the Good Book of Salinger is fairly simple:

Will Pope Bubba be celebrating Easter in Vatican City this year?

And the answer from Holden Caulfield and co. is:

..."I expected to see a day-old infant in your arms.  Nowhere to turn.  Snowflakes in your eyelashes."  He's a very witty guy sometimes...

There you have it.  Saint Marty is a very witty guy, defying people's expectations.  Habemus Papam!

Long live Pope Bubba!