Showing posts with label Sunday morning. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Sunday morning. Show all posts

Monday, June 10, 2024

June 10: "Sunday Morning," Imperfection, "Haunted"

Billy Collins' cat waits patiently . . .

Sunday Morning

by: Billy Collins

Opening a book of poems
about flowers,

the cat amuses herself
while she waits for me to wake up.



Poetry has been distracting me all day.  Revising poems.  Arranging poems.  Reading poems.  Revising those poems again.  If I had a wealthy patron, I'd have zero problems just staring out my window and scribbling in my journal for extended periods.  I truly can amuse myself for hours and hours with poetry.

Tonight, I performed in a show at the library where I (you guessed it!) read poetry again, as well as acted in skits, sang, and told stories.  I was lucky enough to share the stage with some really talented writers, musicians, and actors, as well.

Near the end of the show (theme:  imperfection), I told a story about my sister and read the poem I wrote for her funeral.  As soon as I started speaking, I knew it was a mistake.  I could feel the emotion climbing into my throat to choke me, which it did.  I could barely speak by the end of it, and I felt like an idiot.

After the show, everyone was incredibly kind to me, with hugs and thank yous and words of encouragement.  And I still felt like an idiot.

Next time, Saint Marty is going to talk about something safe.  Like politics.

Haunted

by: Martin Achatz

I wonder if my sister's ghost
gets tired of my visits to her
grave, rolls over, pretends
to be resting in peace when
she sees my car pull through
the cemetery gates.




Sunday, March 29, 2020

March 29: Truth and Morality, My Father, Sunday Morning

More on the morality of Merton's father . . .

Father was not afraid to express his ideas about truth and morality to anybody that seemed to need them--that is, if a real occasion arose.  He did not, of course, go around interfering with everybody else's business.  But once his indignation go the better of him, and he gave a piece of his mind to a shrew of a French-woman, one of those spiteful sharp-tongued bourgeoises, who was giving free expression to her hatred of one of her neighbors who very much resembled herself.

He asked her why she thought Christ had told people to love their enemies.  Did she suppose God commanded this for His benefit?  Did He get anything out of it that He really needed from us?  Or was it not rather for our own good that he had given us this commandment?  He told her that if she had any sense, she would love other people if only for the sake of the good and health and peace of her own soul, instead of tearing herself to pieces with her own envy and spitefulness.  It was St. Augustine's argument, that envy and hatred try to pierce our neighbor with a sword, when the blade cannot reach him unless it first passes through our own body.  I suppose Father had never read any of St. Augustine, but he would have liked him.  

This incident with the shrew reminds one a little of Leon Bloy.  Father had not read him either, but he would have liked him too.  They had much in common, but Father shared none of Bloy's fury.  If he had been a Catholic, his vocation as a lay-contemplative would certainly have developed along the same lines.  For I am sure he had that kind of a vocation.  But unfortunately it never really developed, because he never got to the Sacraments.  However, there were in him the latent germs of the same spiritual poverty and all of Bloy's hatred of materialism and of false spiritualities and of worldly values in people who called themselves Christians.

For some reason, when Merton speaks of his father in this book, I picture my own father.  I'm not sure if this association has anything to do with Owen Merton's character or just the fact that, since Merton provides no clear descriptions of his father (other than some passages about his facial hair), I fill in the physical details with those of my own dad.  Or it may simply be that the word "father" in my mind is delineated by my experiences, and I am projecting them into my reading of Merton's memoir.

Yet, here I sit, on a rainy Sunday morning in late March in the Upper Peninsula of Michigan in the middle of a global pandemic in the year 2020, being visited by the ghosts of two fathers--Merton's and my own.  My father was born in 1927, nine years after the Spanish flu pandemic of 1918, and he died in 2018, 100 years after the Spanish flu and two years before Covid-19.  Owen Merton died in 1931, just four years after my father was born, and roughly 13 years after the Spanish flu outbreak.  Owen was an artist.  My dad was a plumber.  Owen was unschooled in religion.  My dad was a cradle to grave Catholic.  Yet, both men had some kind of internal moral compass that was uncompromising.

Don't get me wrong.  My dad was no saint, and neither was Merton's father.  Owen Merton was an itinerant painter who had no problem leaving the care of his children to almost complete strangers in pursuit of his art.  My dad was stridently conservative in his values, and his ideas of social responsibility bordered on (and sometimes stepped fully into) racism at times.  No person is perfect, and these two fathers bear that out.  And both had different responses to organized religion.

Yet again, there is no church this Sunday morning, which unsettles me a great deal, because my father and mother dragged me to Mass every weekend, forced me to fast during Lent, and made my siblings and me recite the rosary every night after dinner.  You could say that my internal clock and calendar were synced with the Church.  Were he alive today, my father would be restless and unsettled without Church, as well.  As a child, he served as an altar boy and graduated from a Catholic high school.  Up until just a few years before his death, my dad was an usher, passing the baskets down the pews every Saturday evening.

Merton's father, it seems, was aware of the teachings of Jesus Christ.  The above passage seems to indicate that Owen Merton actually embraced Christian morality and put it into practice, even though he didn't prescribe to any religious denomination.  Maybe that's why Merton turned out to be a monk and on the shortlist to sainthood.  For Merton, religion wasn't about being IN a church.  For Merton, religion was about BEING a church.  Big difference.  He learned that from his father.

So, both of these fathers passed along some pretty strong lessons about church and religion to their sons.  It took me a while, but I finally realized that Jesus Christ was a social extremist.  Believe it or not, friends, he was more radical than Bernie Sanders in his teachings.  Most Christians don't see Him that way, but He was.  Feed the poor.  Share your wealth.  Take care of the sick.  Watch out for the elderly.  Teach the young.  Sound familiar?  That's not Bernie's platform.  That's Gospel.  Merton got that from his dad.  I, because my dad dragged me to church every weekend and holy day, got it, too, although my father probably wouldn't admit to Jesus' progressiveness.

So, here I sit, working a check-in table at the hospital on a Sunday morning, haunted by two guys, one long dead, the other still very much present in memory.  For the third week in a row, the churches are empty.  People are "attending" worship online.  Me?  I'm thinking that Jesus would probably be sitting at a check-in table at a hospital.  Or bringing sick people to the ER.  Or dropping groceries off on front porches.  Or multiplying masks and gloves.  He'd be pretty darn busy.  Jesus learned that from His father.

Saint Marty hopes his kids learn some good lessons from him, too.

Be well and healthy, everyone.  Amen.


Sister by Jon Cattapan

Saturday, May 5, 2012

May 5: "Toddlers and Tiaras," Medals, Pizza

I got to the dance competition site around 7 a.m., giving me the opportunity to observe mothers bringing their young children in for the day.  It was like watching a live episode of Toddlers and Tiaras.  I saw one mother ordering her eight-year-old daughter to bend, flip, and leap all over the lobby.  The kid, dressed in a two-piece, midriff-baring, sequined outfit, followed her mother's commands like a trained monkey.  It was a little disconcerting.  I'm not even sure this little girl was having fun.  From my vantage point, she looked like she was preparing for battle.

During the course of the day, I saw little dancers slip, fall, and run off the stage in tears.  I also saw dancers perform like pros.  One particular solo was to the Billy Joel song "Lullaby," and it actually made me cry.  The only other dancer who was able to move me like that was my daughter, who was stunning.

My daughter danced twice today.  For her solo, she received a silver star.  For her group dance, she received a gold.  Of course, I think she deserved much higher on both, but then again, I may be a little biased.  I'm not exactly Tonya Harding, but a little piece of me celebrated when I saw another dancer in my daughter's categories make a mistake.  I think that's just natural.  I want my daughter to do the best that she can, and I want everybody else to fracture a kneecap.

My daughter just got back from playing with her friends.  It's 11:30 at night, and she's taking a shower.  We ordered pizza for dinner.  It was some of the best pizza I've ever tasted.  Stuffed crust from Pizza Hut.  I was a little famished.

We don't have to get up early tomoorw.  My daughter doesn't perform until the afternoon.

For the first time in about a year, Saint Marty isn't setting an alarm for Sunday morning.

Silver and gold, baby