February 20: So It Goes, Craziness, Poetry Presentations

So it goes.

I forgot my copy of Slaughterhouse at home, so I cannot continue with the story this evening.  Instead, I quote one of the refrains of the novel--"So it goes."  Vonnegut usually uses the phrase after something ridiculous or catastrophic happens in Billy Pilgrim's life.  Billy's father dies in a hunting accident.  So it goes.  Billy's wife dies of carbon monoxide poisoning.  So it goes.  Billy becomes unstuck in time.  So it goes.  To me, the phrase is slightly fatalistic, as if the world is simply a series of unfortunate events (to borrow a phrase from Lemony Snicket).

My day has sort of been a "so it goes" day.  I found out I had to replace the battery on the car I bought last July.  So it goes.  I lost my I.D. badge in the medical office where I work.  So it goes.  As I was driving back to work, I got interviewed on my iPhone by a reporter about being Poet Laureate, nearly causing me to hit a parked car.  So it goes.  I found my badge under an envelope on my desk.  So it goes.  I have three hours of poetry presentations to listen to in my night class this evening.  So it goes.

I feel like I have been tightrope walking all day, craziness just one misstep away.  But, I have retained my good mood amid bouts of panic and anger and panic again.  That's just how my week days are.  By about nine o'clock tonight, I will be ready to become unstuck in time myself.

I have no idea what I said during my interview this afternoon.  I can only hope that the interviewer is kind and makes me sound somewhat intelligent, instead of a babbling idiot.  (If you can't tell, I have self esteem issues to go along with my lost I.D. and reckless driving.)

Saint Marty is thankful that the day is almost over.