I was already nearly too old for Ripley Court, being by now fourteen, but I had to pick up enough Latin to be able to make at least a presentable showing in a scholarship examination for some Public School. As to the school where I should go, Uncle Ben made a more or less expert choice, in his capacity as retired headmaster of a prep school. Since Father was poor, and an artist, there would be no thinking of one of the big schools like Harrow or Winchester--though Winchester was the one for which Uncle Ben had the greatest respect, having achieved his ambition of sending many of his pupils there with scholarships. The reason was twofold: not merely that Father could not be considered able to pay the bills (although, in fact, Pop was to pay them, from America) but the scholarship examinations would be altogether too hard for me.
The final choice was regarded by everyone as very suitable. It as an obscure little school in the Midlands, and old foundation, with a kind of a little tradition of its own. It had recently gone up slightly in its rating because of the work of its greatest headmaster, who was just about to retire--all of this was the kind of thing Uncle Ben knew and told me, and Aunt Maud confirmed it, saying:
"I am sure you will find Oakham a very nice school."
There's something very ominous in these three paragraphs. Merton has not had a good track record when it comes to Public Schools. The fact that the title of the next chapter of The Seven Storey Mountain is "The Harrowing of Hell" also does not bode well. Although, when looking at the list of notable alumni from Oakham on Wikipedia, Thomas Merton is prominent, along with a couple bishops, famous mathematicians, and a British Ambassador to Peru. So, Oakham is still going strong.
Today is Mother's Day. I will not be able to see my mother in person, because of the pandemic. She is in her late eighties, and, since I work in a medical setting, I don't even want to take the chance of spreading the virus to her. Yet, Merton's Aunt Maud, who has the last work on Oakham in this passage, reminds me a lot of my mom.
My mother always wanted what was best for me. When I said I wanted to study English in college and become a writer, she said something like, "Well, why don't you go into computers. There's a good future in that. You can take all the English classes you want, too." So, I became a Computer Science major, just like Merton followed Aunt Maud's advice and went to Oakham.
Strong women have always had a huge influence on my life. I'm the youngest of nine kids. I have three older brother, five sisters in between, and then I came along. Thus, my sisters had a big hand in shaping me into who I am. My mother had her hands full with so many kids. So, my oldest sister pretty much taught me how to drive. My middle sisters chauffeured me to play practices before I had my own driver's license. They listened to my short stories and plays and poems. Praised me, even though I'm pretty sure they thought I was a little odd. I was.
And then I met my wife, who came from a family of very strong women. All of these ladies (grandmother, great aunts, mother, sisters, cousins) taught me so much about being a loving and supportive man, partner, and father to my wife and kids. They have all been a part of my life for close to 30 years, and I don't know what I would do without them.
The mother of my children has had many struggles in her life with mental illness and addiction. It has not been an easy road. Our marriage and family have weathered some pretty turbulent storms. Yet, through all of these difficult times, I think my kids have always known that they were loved and cherished by her. That is really important.
So, on this day that celebrates motherhood, in all its shapes and forms, I give thanks for all of the strong females in my life, who have molded me and made me a better person. They truly are heroes, each and every one.
Saint Marty loves them all.
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