January 7: "Rye" Dip Monday, New Year, Old Friends

Last year, on Mondays, I fell into the habit of doing what I called a Carol dip.  I asked one of the burning questions I had about my life (things like "Will my pants fit tomorrow morning?" and "Did I remember to unplug the toaster?"), and then I flipped through my copy of A Christmas Carol and randomly put my finger on a page to find my answer.

Today, I inaugurate Rye Dip Monday.  The same rules apply, except that I'm depending on the pages of The Catcher in the Rye instead of Charles Dickens' tale of Ebenezer Scrooge.  I'm sort of leery about using Salinger.  Holden's story isn't quite a feel-good, Readers Digest kind of book.  I may not get quite so many happy answers from it as I did from Tiny Tim and Bob Cratchit.  However, I will play the cards that are dealt me, to quote Kenny Rogers.

Before I move on to my question, I want to sit here and enjoy the peace around me at the moment.  I'm still on vacation.  My daughter and son are at school.  The TV is silent.  The Christmas tree is glowing in the corner of the room, and I have a few hours of solitude stretching out before me like a lazy cat.  I could really get used to this full-time, tenured professor kind of lifestyle.

Speaking of which, this afternoon, my wife and I are meeting some friends from the university for lunch.  Matt is a full-time professor in creative writing, and he has the kind of existence I dream about.  He publishes books like crazy.  He's on his way to tenure.  He just bought a huge house with like four bedrooms and twenty bathrooms (OK, I'm exaggerating a little--but it's a big house!).  Don't misunderstand me.  He works hard for everything he has.  I don't begrudge him a thing.  However, it is sometimes difficult to hold my jealousy in check.  It's one of my many character defects.  But I'm looking forward to spending some time with Matt and his wife, Louisa, who are simply all 'round lovely people.

On with business now.  In this new year, my first question for Rye Dip Monday sort of relates to my friend Matt:

Will I ever be in the same circumstances as Matt, job-wise and house-wise?

And the answer from J. D. Salinger is:

Finally I got out of bed, with just my pajamas on, and opened the door.  I didn't even have to turn the light on in the room, because it was already daylight...

There you have it.  Opportunity is going to knock for me, I just have to get out of bed and open the door.  (Of course, for Holden, it's a doorman and a pimp knocking, looking to collect money, but let's not go there.)

Maybe 2013 is going to be a good year for Saint Marty.

I just need the directions to this intersection

April 24: Feeling Punky, Motrin, Student Praise

I've been feeling pretty punky most of the day.  I was absolutely exhausted this morning.  I could have put my head down on my desk and fallen asleep for a couple of hours.  I think I had a fever, as well.

This afternoon, I took an 800 mg Motrin, and, let me tell you, I could actually lift my head up after a half hour without my eyes feeling like they were going to explode in my sockets.  I feel so much better, even though I'm still a little tired.

I had my students do my classroom evaluations this afternoon.  One of my students, a smart, young guy, told me at the end of class, "Dude, I gave you the best class evaluation I've ever given in my entire life.  I'm not fuckin' kidding."

I thanked him for being so kind.

"No," he said, "you don't get it.  I told them they should hire you as a full-time professor."

For a moment, I thought about the current contract negotiations going on at the university.  I thought about the threats the administration is making about cancelling the adjunct e-mail accounts and repossessing our laptops.  I thought about the fact that I could never survive on the salary the university is currently paying me.  I smiled at my student and said, "From your laptop to President X's ears."

"Dude," the student said, "I'll call the fuckin' president of the university up and tell him personally.  Do you want me to do that?  I'm serious."

And he was serious.  I could tell.  It made me feel like I've actually made a difference in his life.

Saint Marty actually did some larnin' this semester.  Did you hear that, President X?

Them's words to live by