March 22: Ackley, Need a Friend, P.O.E.T.S. Day Friend

All of a sudden, Ackley barged in again through the damn shower curtains, as usual.  For once in my stupid life, I was really glad to see him.  He took my mind off the other stuff.

Holden has love/hate relationships with a lot of the people.  His roommate Stradlater, who goes on a date with Jane.  His mother and father, who can't seem to see how Holden is struggling after his younger brother's death.  His brother D.B., who sells out to Hollywood.  And Ackley, the guy who keeps barging into his dorm room uninvited.

I think most relationships are like this.  Love.  Hate.  Sometimes, you want to spend the whole day with a person, from breakfast to lunch to dinner to sauna where you whip each other's asses with birch branches.  Okay, maybe not the sauna thing.  Other times, the way that person chews a banana can make you want to commit ritual seppuku.  It's the normal ebb and flow of interpersonal interaction.  (I learned that in therapy.)

This morning, as I was driving into work, I passed a bank with a flashing sign.  It flashed the time and temperature and date.  It flashed "Happy Saint Patrick's Day," even though Saint Patrick's Day was last weekend.  Then it flashed this message:  "Need a friend?"  Now, I know that it was some kind of sales gimmick to generate business for the friends at Scru-U Savings and Loan.  Need a friend?  Come in and talk to our loan officer.  She'll give you enough money to buy the entire cast of Glee as friends.  However, that simple question made me reflect on the people who make me feel good about myself.

Last night, I gave a poetry reading.  There were three people in the audience.  Two good friends and my wife (who is my best friend).  I had two other friends playing music and singing, as well.  I was surrounded by love, and it was great.  For an hour, I read poems, told stories, and listened to some really great songs that I got to pick out.

My phone rang about an hour after I got home from the reading.  It was my friend, Linda, who sang and played guitar during the reading.  "I just want to thank you," she said.  "I want to let you know how good that was."  I said something about how her music really made the difference.  "Oh, no," she said.  "You really are great.  Thank you for letting me be a part of that."

That's what friends are for.  Even though the number of people in the audience wouldn't even make up a bowling team, Linda made me feel like I'd just delivered my Nobel Prize lecture.  I was blessed and grateful.

Need a friend?  This P.O.E.T.S. Day, Saint Marty knows he has the best friends in the world.

You've got a friend in me

March 21: Sort of Funny, Stupid Laughs, Poetry Reading

The whole thing was sort of funny, in a way, if you thought about it, and all of a sudden I did something I shouldn't have.  I laughed.  And I have one of these very loud, stupid laughs.  I mean if I ever sat behind myself in a movie or something, I'd probably lean over and tell myself to please shut up.  It made old Sally madder than ever.

Holden does a lot of things to piss people off in The Catcher in the Rye.  In the above paragraph, he manages to offend his date.  He laughs in uncomfortable situations.  He has just told Sally that she gives him "a pain in the ass," and she is not reacting well to his constructive criticism.  That's why Holden is laughing.

I tend to be like Holden in stressful circumstances.  When I go out to my car at the end of a crappy day and I have a flat tire, or when I leave for work at 4:30 a.m. in a blizzard, I laugh, giggle, chortle, guffaw, snicker.  I probably look and sound like Norman registering Marion Crane into the Bates Motel.  It's about tension release in a situation over which I have no control.

Tonight, I'm giving a poetry reading at church.  Before Ash Wednesday, I sat down with the pastor and worked out the schedule for a series of Thursday night events during the Lenten season.  The first week was a concert by the church's praise band (a bust).  The second week, nothing happened (I was busy, the pastor was out-of-town).  The third week was a slide show and discussion of the pastor's recent trip to the Holy Land (a success--over twenty people attended).  The fourth week, a Christian comedy video (hilariously funny, but only two other people showed up).  The fifth week, tonight, is my poetry reading.  I'm not holding out too much hope.

That doesn't mean I won't enjoy myself.  I will have at least three or four people in the audience.  One of those people will be a colleague from the university.  The possibility of supreme embarrassment is huge.  If only three people attend, I will laugh, perhaps make a joke about trying the veal and tipping the waiter, and then read my poems.

However, I've enjoyed preparing for tonight.  Going through my poems, selecting what I'm going to read, talking to the musicians who are helping me out.  That's all been great fun.  Now comes the litmus test.  There are a two possible scenarios for this evening:

Poetry + Musicians - Audience = Embarrassed Laughter + Humiliation

or

Poetry + Musicians + Audience = Blessings + Grace

Stop by Mitchell United Methodist Church in Negaunee, Michigan, at 7 p.m. tonight.  Be a part of the equation.

Saint Marty will do his part to establish equilibrium.

Where's Sean Connery when I need him